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Greatsharkbite
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27 Oct 2011, 4:43 pm

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What do all of you think? Are these people who claim to be autistic yet also claim that they are social people, just posing as someone with autism for some reason


I'm a loner, but not by choice. That said.. I hate most people. Their flaws seem small to most others, but incredibly painful and annoying to me. I've been in the situation where someone has talked on and on and it has made me very annoyed.

But its what I talk about--and who I talk to that make the major difference. Most people that others find incredibly interesting and suave I am generally annoyed by and most people who I want to talk to--don't want to talk to me. I am misanthropic, this doesn't give me less of a need to socialize or desire human contact. I want to be heard, I want to be listened to and I want to be respected.

But I miss most social cues, i'm not "perceived" as funny or interesting until maybe later if a person gets to know me in depth. (Has only happened once or twice)

People are often responsible for their own nonsense--but the thing with many people who judge "quiet" and socially shy people is that they perceive it as our fault. It maybe something we're born wih and yet perceived by an overwhelming majority that its something that can be fixed guaranteed through effort. Even people who are close to me have thought this way, I have had one or two friends that I could have had. But even most of my friendships that i've had.. (ALL of them within the past 10 years of my life) have not been desirable on any level. Then aside for maybe 1 year, I have not had a true friend since 17.

I'd like the way the world to work is for someone to befriend you on just the one or two interests.. instead it requires small talk, personal possession, or being someone you're not to give an artifical smile every 5 minutes.



SammichEater
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27 Oct 2011, 9:50 pm

Yes, and mostly by choice.


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AngelKnight
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28 Oct 2011, 5:48 pm

Generally a loner. Finding people I'm comfortable dealing with is difficult. Finding people who are comfortable dealing with me is difficult too. And the intersection of those people is rather small.

Though, being alone != being lonely. Part of why it's difficult for me to keep friends is that I keep forgetting to miss them.

(Yikes, I didn't cop onto just how creepy-emo that last bit was until it was typed out. Oh well.)



tcorrielus
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29 Oct 2011, 9:53 am

I am a loner most of the time, but I do hang out with a few good friends whenever they're free from school and work.

Making and maintaining friendships with many people from school and work have been the biggest challenges for me since high school. It's mainly due to their failure or reluctance to communicate with me thru email, facebook and cell phones.



SirSnoopy
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29 Oct 2011, 1:20 pm

AngelKnight wrote:
Part of why it's difficult for me to keep friends is that I keep forgetting to miss them.

(Yikes, I didn't cop onto just how creepy-emo that last bit was until it was typed out. Oh well.)


Creepy-emo I don't know, but so very recognizable (and quite well said if you ask me). If I had friends, I would have to mark reminders in my calendar to contact them on a regular basis.



hanyo
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29 Oct 2011, 3:55 pm

Yes. Even back when I was in school I had a teacher write on a report about me "She is a loner" in large capital letters and underlined it multiple times.



MysteryLife
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29 Oct 2011, 10:50 pm

Yes im a loner. I've tried many times to 'put myself out there' but it just dosent work! So I gave up trying to befriend NTs to save myself the disapointment. Anyway, im looking for friends that are like me so if you want to chat some im here :)



Sweetleaf
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29 Oct 2011, 11:51 pm

Not by choice....



Sparx
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29 Oct 2011, 11:56 pm

Sometimes it'd be really nice if I weren't. But... I just don't want to do what most other people want to do.



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30 Oct 2011, 8:15 am

Yes i am ! !! :(



Joe90
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30 Oct 2011, 12:31 pm

I used to be at high school, between the ages of 11 and 14. All of my teenage cousins started getting friends of their own and so didn't hang out with me so much any more, and I didn't have any friends otherwise. I remember when I was 13 I got a mobile phone (because I seemed to be the only one without one). I didn't quite know how to use it, all I did was play games on it. I never knew how to send or receive a message because nobody ever wanted my number, only relatives. When I took it to school, all the girls in the class wanted to have a look at my mobile phone, but nobody bothered to ask for my number.

I felt so miserable when I was between the ages of 11 and 14 because everybody around me had friends, and I got criticised so badly. I used to walk to school with my cousin, but he always had a friend tagging along. If I tried to hang out with the other girls in my class at recess times, they either just ignored me or made me go away. So I ended up just walking around on my own at lunch. Then one of my other cousins came upto me and said, ''what are you doing?'' and I said, ''I'm spying on teachers'', and she said, ''why? You should be with your friends!'' And she turned around and went back to join her crowd of friends. I stood there and realised how sad I was running around the school spying on teachers ON MY OWN. I never chose to be on my own. It's just that I was so rejected by other girls that I didn't know where else to turn except do little tasks to take my mind off of it all. I didn't want to just tag along behind my cousins and their groups of friends. I wanted friends of my own. Luckily by year 10 I managed to find some friends of my own, which got my confidence up. They were from my class, but they were still in the same grade, and we hung out together. I bet that showed everybody!


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aspi-rant
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30 Oct 2011, 1:20 pm

loner.

have tried most of my life, but haven't any energy left to socialize anymore. i was never good at it. always in the background. the loner.

i would love to have a partner to share interests and life with. it would suffice. no need for anything else.



auntblabby
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31 Oct 2011, 6:53 am

aspi-rant wrote:
i would love to have a partner to share interests and life with. it would suffice. no need for anything else.


QFT+!



Phipe
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31 Oct 2011, 1:09 pm

I like loneliness. It is just unfortunate that i am interesting to other people.
Most recent example; a few weeks ago, a new girl started talk to me for the first time in school, when i politely asked her to Go To Hell. In latin. I am a friend of hers now. the heck, is latin the language of love now?



auntblabby
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01 Nov 2011, 12:14 am

Phipe wrote:
I like loneliness. It is just unfortunate that i am interesting to other people.
Most recent example; a few weeks ago, a new girl started talk to me for the first time in school, when i politely asked her to Go To Hell. In latin. I am a friend of hers now. the heck, is latin the language of love now?


that reminds me of me and cats- i chase them off repeatedly but as soon as i sit down there they are again jumping up in my lap. if only people were more like cats.