What the non-depressed think of depression

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So, my best friend (most likely NT, imo) was over today and we stayed up watching tv pretty late. As you may or may not know, commercials for all kinds of meds come on late at night right..

Well this long commercial about depression comes on and he made some comment about how "Personally, I think all this depression stuff is BS- they should just stop feeling sorry for themselves and get a job".

Now, I have never told anyone specifically that I get bouts of depression, but this confirms that he didn't even notice that I had it!

Does my family suspect? Maybe. They've seen me before, I try to hide it from everyone else. But still, not a clue? I'm relieved in some small way I suppose that he has no idea.. but also kinda upset. I can't ever tell him now.

He has never had to put up with it before, to make his life revolve around the curse. To hear him say that made me upset. He does better than me in school, he can focus, he can do all sorts of things because he does not have that roadblock in his path.

But still, I have been there. Got the t-shirt.

Not going to start an argument with my one and only friend. Not going to let depression take him away too! But it makes me sad knowing people are capable of judging others in this way!

To summarize, when someone says they are depressed I approach with caution.. yes it is used as an alternative to "im bummed" nowadays but serious cases are not rare either.

Wow your friend is clearly quite ignorant about depression, the whole reason depression sucks so much is because interferes with ones very ability to 'get over it and get a job'....It would upset me as well.

Bingo! There are some days for sure that I feel well enough to take on the world. I can do anything, overcome any obstacle! Those days are what keeps me fighting. Sometimes I even apply for a job on those days. Kinda reckless even..

Any then the next day. Bam.

Depression isn't something I would wish on my worst enemy.. but sometimes a trial period might be kinda useful I feel.

I don't even get days like that...but some days are worse than others.

I think sometimes I got depression with a pinch of bipolar.. im talking 1 maybe happy days a month. Not always either.

The rest, eh.. well on a scale of -10 to 10, 0 ain't so bad is basically it. When you go from horrible for so long to average, average feels pretty awesome.


I've always had this theory that people write their lives before living them, at least the basic path. Maybe I wanted to give myself an appreciation for the average?

Bah, still a stupid idea from mortal me point of view..

generally people avoid those who suffer from depression

NT's can make out who is depressed they keep a safe distance from such person then

I have mild depression i can do all the work, etc nothing wrong that way
but i am unable to socialise, communicate, i look sad though inside i am ok
this is due to childhood abuse
but still people ignore and avoid me

It's funny how the treatment one actually gets from others is pretty much the total opposite of what is recommended for depressed people, and they wonder why peoples depression does not improve well there's one major reason right there.

Depressed people when cared for, counselled and loved will get better, depression is a disease like all other disease
but when the depressed person is shunned, shut off, hurt, deprived of love, care they go more and more deeper and ultimately
there is suicide.
Majority of the suicides can be avoided, no person just attempts suicide randomly they have years and years of depression
behind them, coupled with genetic tendencies and social factor.
psychology terms them borderline because they stand in border of normal world and delusion any major tragedy can create a great flux and
they will go into breakdown.

That i what I am saying if people naturally avoid people who seem depressed, how are they supposed to get that?...and yes I know too well how that process goes as it describes what went on with me before I attempted suicide and my depression still has not really improved....trouble is when social interactions just reinforce the depressed feelings and thoughts so then I just want to avoid everything more. So yeah its a rather vicious cycle and hopefully I don't reach that breakdown point but I would not be surprised if I did.

I did not particularly like when we discussed depression in my psychology class, because it was well........depressing.

Personally, imo, I feel it's all a sense of control. I feel that people allow exterior events to control their life and the way they feel. Now not always, sometimes it's more of a mood disorder. I understand this with my brothers mood disorder and being on the spectrum, but other times I think it's simply a lack of self control to be honest. Just like when kids have bad dreams, parents just allow their kid to be controlled by the bad dream and coddle the child. My dad use to tell me I had control over my dreams and I can change whatever I want, I never put the bad dreams in control. My point is that people let things control them and then they get depressed with things they can control. Like I feel no sympathy for people who have terminal illnesses because they allow the terminal illness to control them by being depressed, etc. Not everyone, but most people. I'm not irrational I understand mood disorders and unable to control their emotions, but other times people just let things control them.

Depression by definition is a mood disorder....feeling depressed when something depressing happens is not the same thing as having depression. It is unfortunate people sometimes confuse the two though.

Also when I was a growing I tried very hard to have a positive outlook, and be hopeful and optimistic about things, but my environment and a lot of the social interaction did not allow for that to last very long. So I think in most cases of having Depression its a bit more then a simple lack of self control. Also I don't think people with terminal illnesses choose to be depressed, I'd think it would be very difficult not to be depressed in such a situation.

The problem with depression is, of course, that the very first thing to go is the ability to "pick yourself up". I think this is very difficult to grasp for someone who haven't themselves experienced the lethargy of depression.

that is one of the worst things about it, not sure whats worse though when people get aggressive towards one for not being able to pick them self up(one of the major symptoms of depression) or just that its very difficult to do so.

And I still have no sympathy for people who have terminal illnesses and I still have no sympathy for people whom say they had a bad environment. I too had a bad social environment growing up. I still have a bad environment. I too tried to do the whole optimistic outlook thing it never worked. However, I'm not depressed about it nor do I give up. I simply bounce back. I did everything in my life to become stronger. I was not going to let those situations control me, I was not going to give up on myself or my life just because I had a poor experience. I picked myself out of the gutter. I don't think optimistic, I think rational and logical. But I'll never let that control me, I'll never let the poor experiences control the way I feel. I picked myself up. I made myself stronger. And I hate people with a victim mentality.

"Oh poor me I have a terminal illness" victim mentality. As if someone had spited them. No matter what you have been given you fight. Don't give up. It isn't about optimism. It's about fighting; it's about being stronger and passing your own limitations. My girlfriend has lupus and sickle cell. But she is wonderful. Charastmastic, things I am not. She has never let her illness get to her. She's far more optimistic than me. But she is fighting for her dream. She doesn't want to let her illness defeat her. She wants complete all her dreams. She's smart and funny. And it shows me that people can choose how they feel about something.

Not everyone. And I think I made that clear in my previous message. There is depression and there is mood disorder depression. Maybe I didn't make that very clear, however, I understand being unable to control how you feel and being able to control how you feel. Most of my message is about those who can control how they feel.

In my post I was referring to the mood disorder Depression not the term depression in general...It just seems you might make the assumption people are of the type who can control how they feel a bit much, but I could be wrong as I don't know you.

Thing is that I fought. It isn't really hate just I feel nothing for people whom don't try; whom have the ability to try. All though as stated I understand depression as a mood disorder. My younger brother [19], and the youngest is at 14[ turning 15 this April] but he doesn't apply to this situation, the 19 year old has a mood disorder as well as being on the spectrum. I understand not being able to control oneself. I understand the struggles of a mood disorder versus just the word depression. I was simply speaking on the term of depression, not the disorder. Since I don't know to much about it, I only know from what I witness of the 19 year old and I cannot put myself through it all.