Clingy internet friend

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An old online friend got back in touch with me this year after we had not spoken in maybe 4 or 5 years. We used to chat great but it seems like he has changed. I can't keep the conversation going and I never know what t say or talk about and he takes this all personally. No one else has ever taken it personally. Then when he gets upset and calls himself boring and all, I never know what so to say I never say anything. I just feel he is too clingy because it takes it all too personally and he has called me rude for it. Has anyone else ever gotten this from people or is it just him with the issue?

I'm going through this right now with a girl I know. I figure, if she's not talking to me she must hate me, so I don't even try to talk to her anymore. It's a blow to the ego, especially since I like this girl as more than a friend. She claims she "wants to talk to me all the time" but goes off and plays a Facebook game (not to mention talks to other people) and just completely ignores me. Oh wait, every once in a while she'll pop up and randomly say something, or like my comment or something.

If he's trying to talk and you don't say anything, of course he's gonna take it personally. Not to be rude or anything. It just means that he values you. And the more you don't say to him, the more clingy he's gonna get. Maybe try to explain to him that you don't know what to say to him and see what he says. It's better than just ignoring the person.

I'm not ignoring him and the more he acts this way, the more I want to block him because it is really starting to get to me. He like expects me to do the impossible and I have tried to explain to him I don't know what to say or talk about. He just doesn't get it. No one else has ever acted this way towards me. They have only said "I can tell you have AS because you hardly talk" uh they are doing it too, also hardly talking to me. How can they say it's my AS if they are doing it themselves too? Sometimes both people don't know what to say to each other nor talk about.

League_girl, I find myself in exactly the same situation as you so I can understand your frustration. Do you feel like the only thing you can think of doing is to completely cut contact, for your own sake and his?

I don't know what to advise but I have found myself in a similar situation. I have told the guy that I can't just magic things out of my head if I'm not in the mood to talk and/or if I have a blank mind. In the end I start catastrophising about myself being boring and getting very depressed... but the guy is so kind to me, it's like he's happy to listen. He'd rather listen to me moan on endlessly about how hopeless I am, than not have me talk at all, which I find crazy but oh well?!

It's such a shame though, as when we first used to speak I could sit and chat for hours on end about absolute nothingness, which was totally unlike me. So now it looks like I don't like him - when really I do. So frustrating.

ANYWAY. All I can suggest is to keep being honest with him and tell him that you don't know what to say. And if he thinks you're rude then it's not your fault. At least you'll be doing the decent thing by letting him know. You also have to remember that you're not the only one responsible for keeping the conversation going - he is, too.

Yes I have been feeling this way off and on. I have not been on IM lately because I am not in a chatting mood. Sometimes I log in invisible to chat with a certain person.

I don't call someone who hasn't said hello in 5 years without a good reason a good friend.

You ignoring him? Naw, he ignored you for FIVE YEARS. Did he have a good reason for that?

Much, if not most, internet chatter is a waste of time.

I would ignore him and not look back. Or, just say you won't be online much now since you're busy.. or whatever.

He hasn't bothered to say hello in 5 years, and you don't really know him anyway... you just know what he's told you about himself online.

I suppose you could muster a short chat every now and then instead of totally dropping him. But, I wouldn't waste a great deal of time on it.

I think the block button is calling cut ties with him for both your sakes.
He cut contact with you before probably out of boredom or other girls being on the scene.
Now there aren't any he wants you and is getting all poopy about it.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-WvAzMpYHQ8[/youtube]

I know what you mean. I have 2 online friends that I talk to every single day and I usually have difficulty chatting and doing other things at the same time. Well when I joined WP some of that focus was taken away cos I was reading and posting in the evenings so nothing was really being said and they threw hints like "since u are so busy I go afk" and "not around again -.-" and they start complaining about how much time there was from the last thing that was said. I didn't want to tell them about WP though, so I couldn't think of an excuse. Looks like I really can't do anything else at the same time. But the thing is, they weren't saying anything either! It's as though they expect me to be the one talking? I wouldn't call them clingy though, but yours seems much worse. It could also be because he's recently suffered a rejection or something, which might explain why he randomly got back in touch. That must be a really exasperating situation to be in. If I were you I would block him if he becomes extremely irritating and is causing you to appear invisible to avoid him, but it depends whether or not he keeps starting up a convo as soon as you sign in. Hmm, I don't know... it's a tricky one.

We lost contact because he lost my email. I forget the reason why. He got a new computer or something and he lost all his contacts. Then we recently got back in touch somehow. I think it was on Facebook. Dang even I can't remember his story and how we got back in touch.

He did have an online friend who was female and then she stopped coming on. He doesn't know where she went. I wonder if she blocked him. Sometimes people just block you, so you end up thinking they stopped coming online. I know someone who had an online friend and one day she stopped coming on. He got worried about her and thought she was hurt with Katrina and was without electricity. He was emailing her and trying to contact her on other websites to see if she was okay and she didn't respond. He got even more worried so he started calling her. Obviously she shared that much personal information with him. Then he was on a website and he saw posts by her saying what a stalker she has and she had blocked him because she decided to get over her fetish and blocked everyone who was into it. My friend was upset for the accusation and I was pissed for him too. Then years later she apologized and he forgave her. I would have refused to talk to her for such behavior. I dunno if they are still talking again but I cannot stand to talk to people who just go blocking people when they lose interest in something or decide to get over it. I think if you block someone, don't get so upset if they keep contacting you all over the place and calling you because they do not know you blocked them and you have them worried. I would say either ignore it or just grow some balls and tell them you blocked them and say why. If they keep contacting you after that, then they are the ones with the problem, not you.

Now my friend is posting strange things on my Facebook. He has done it twice so far. I don't know if I am misunderstanding him or if he is truly posting weird things. the comments he has left me makes no sense. I thought about asking him what is his problem but I decided I will ask him that when I go online again and he is online.