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Joined: 23 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 17,605
Location: Maidstone, UK

13 Dec 2012, 4:44 pm

I have a friend who I get on with well, and we have a lot in common, but there is only one personality trait she has that is opposite from me. She easily gets the hump with people over small things, if she's not getting her own way or if she thinks someone has offended her in the slightest way. She could go months without talking to somebody after such a small, silly little disagreement what most people would get over or not worry about at all. She doesn't seem to worry that this kind of behaviour can cause gossip among co-workers, or even disrespect and conflict. She's even got the hump with her boss before, and came storming out of the office, refusing to speak to anyone regardless of who they are.

I am quite the opposite to that. I don't like to upset other people or cause conflict between myself and co-workers. I'm afraid to be like that, in case it backfires and then make me feel bad, especially knowing that my co-workers are all nice people to work with, and I would certainly not storm out on my boss either, because I know I can't always get what I want and I know that one person can't please everybody.

But I find that I am too meek, which then causes me to sometimes be took advantage of. I want to be known as a kind-natured person who would do anything to help others, but I find it hard to be a kind-natured person and an assertive person at the same time. And I know it is not impossible to be like that. I can express my feelings to other people, but I am sometimes afraid to in case it upsets the other person, or makes them feel uncomfortable. Lately at work I've found myself kind of putting all the blame on to me and meekly saying ''it's my fault'' to everything. Like when I leave large equipment in somebody's way and they politely ask me to move it with an apology, I always say something like ''no, no, it's my fault for leaving that there.''

Ugh! I hate myself sometimes!

Aged 29
On antidepressants
Diagnosed with AS, ADHD and anxiety disorder


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Joined: 31 Aug 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,721
Location: In the heart of the dust bowl

13 Dec 2012, 10:10 pm

If I get irritated with someone, I tend to forgive and forget quite easily and swiftly.

There are a couple of people from twenty years ago who I will probably never forgive nor forget, but that is because they are crooks and should be in prison as far as I'm concerned. They cost me and a lot of others a whole lot of money. I wouldn't even consider living in the same city where they live. Maybe not even the same state.

Outside of that, there's not much problem. It's probably been at least five or six years since the last time that anyone really irritated me very much.

I'm much better at irritating others than they are at irritating me. :)


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Joined: 12 Aug 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,737
Location: Washington, D.C.

14 Dec 2012, 1:17 am

Reading what you posted, I think you just have good manners. You take the high road. I don't see anything wrong with what you did.