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Mitrovah
Deinonychus
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Joined: 17 Jan 2013
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 343
Location: Iowa USA

10 Feb 2013, 10:28 pm

hello, i have a bit of conundrum.. I have suspicion that there are about 3 maybe for women on my campus i had class with maybe attracted to me. usually what they do is say hello and want to stop and strike up a conversation of sorts. nothing more than that happens because I am always on the move going somewhere. we don't become chums are start hanging out....
i am assuming almost all the time, women (sometimes men for that matter)who express any interest in talking to me are attracted to me. how to tell if someone is being friendly as a romantic interest or wants to be your platonic friend. this would so much improve my social life if anyone can give a definite empirical answer.



Last edited by Mitrovah on 11 Feb 2013, 11:35 am, edited 1 time in total.

cozysweater
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10 Feb 2013, 10:41 pm

Most likely they are just being friendly. If it's more, there might be body language tells. Like, do they angle themselves toward you when talking, mirror your gestures or, most importantly, do they touch you? Do they flatter you unnecessarily? Laugh at not-so-funny jokes? Do they frequently "just happen to" bump into you during the course of your normal day?

Keep in mind that some people are just friendly. Personally, I smile and say hello to almost everyone I meet (including total strangers that I pass on the bike trail every day). It makes me happier when my interactions with people are pleasant and I've found that when I smile and greet them pleasantly, 9 times out of 10 they return the pleasantness. (also, I'm from Iowa originally so maybe that's where that came from)



Cacao
Tufted Titmouse
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11 Feb 2013, 2:13 am

There is no reason to assume anything. The fact someone is friendly is a normal occurance. If you like someone there is no reason not to say so. But do not go telling a women you want to merry her and have babies just after a first meeting.

I my self can not read much emotions or frequently miss read them. So once there was girl that was hitting on me. I thought she was pushing me because she did not have enough sitting space. Years later I watch a movie that show the exact situation that I had with that girl. She was basically touching me. LOL.

I still can not tell what people think. That is why I ask direct questions and try to be as direct as possible.

The problem is that people assume too many things I can never tell what they think of me or what is happening. I just do no know.

So if someone is friend with me - I do not know. If someone does not like me, I rarely notice unless it gets to the point where they openly say so.



Mitrovah
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

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Joined: 17 Jan 2013
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 343
Location: Iowa USA

11 Feb 2013, 11:41 am

ultimately my problem is i cant read intention when people take an interest in me. i get confused thinking it in my brain and i come to the wrong conclusion, does that sound about right i think the problem my mind is confused as to why people take an interest in me because on self-reflection i don't think there is anything as part of my personality that is especially appealing that is why i am confused and sort of revert to the romantic hypothesis. I have one friend who i am almost in total sync with, way of thinking, sense of humor, sense of propriety and right. he is in alot of way my second self. that is why i am friends with him and want to be his friend. that is a good rational reason he's my friend. but the thing is he is so popular with everyone he meets even though in alot of ways he is the complete opposite, he doesn't drink, he hates religion as an atheist, he is a minimalist and likes punk rock and is a history buff. i really don't get it, he is, alot of ways me, thinks in the same ways i do that make me strange yet what the hell exactly is he doing im not that makes him so damn popular with the world. he is almost "the most interesting man in the world"