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Drehmaschine
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28 Mar 2013, 6:12 pm

I don't know why but for some reason I creep out people. It's been this way when I was little, when I went to Gymnasium, University and now at work. I can tell people are uncomfortable around me even though I don't say anything or do anything wrong and don't get in people's space. During break, I like to watch the other machines and see how they work, but some of the operators seem to be afraid of me. I've been told when I was in school that I remind people of a serial killer. Does anyone else experience this and if so, what should I do to not be the creepy guy?



auntblabby
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28 Mar 2013, 6:28 pm

wish i could help you, dr. dreh, but i am a "creep" also and i can only find solace from that in being a hermit out in the woods. i haven't been able to change how god constructed me. :hmph: btw, you are my aspie hero for being so well-edumacated and successful in the professional realm.



Persevero
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28 Mar 2013, 7:32 pm

Sometimes saying nothing makes you creepier, it's weird I know.

If you want to look with interest at something, make your intention known, like say "Hey, mind if I check out these machines in action?" when you're approaching and if anybody catches you interested in something and stares at you I recommend giving them a small smile and saying something like "I find machines fascinating" instead of ignoring them.



Drehmaschine
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28 Mar 2013, 7:38 pm

Persevero wrote:
Sometimes saying nothing makes you creepier, it's weird I know.

If you want to look with interest at something, make your intention known, like say "Hey, mind if I check out these machines in action?" when you're approaching and if anybody catches you interested in something and stares at you I recommend giving them a small smile and saying something like "I find machines fascinating" instead of ignoring them.

That is actually almost exactly what I did the last two times, but some people still acted like I was strange and they didn't want to be near me.



billiscool
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28 Mar 2013, 10:42 pm

Drehmaschine wrote:
I don't know why but for some reason I creep out people. It's been this way when I was little, when I went to Gymnasium, University and now at work. I can tell people are uncomfortable around me even though I don't say anything or do anything wrong and don't get in people's space. During break, I like to watch the other machines and see how they work, but some of the operators seem to be afraid of me. I've been told when I was in school that I remind people of a serial killer. Does anyone else experience this and if so, what should I do to not be the creepy guy?


wow, I feel sorry for you. What do you look like, sadly people judge people by their looks.



goldfish21
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29 Mar 2013, 3:46 am

It could be the lack of eye contact, if you tend to do that. Might help to try making eye contact more often.

It could be an "expressionless," face if you tend to do that. Might help to smile or look interested/curious - practice these things in front of a mirror so you don't come across as looking even creepier with a forced smile.

It could just be your body language, or lack thereof, if you tend to stand motionless and stare at whatever you're interested in.

It could be the lack of conversation or transparency about what you're doing. People hate being watched while they work, but if they know why you're hanging around and watching something - because you're interested in the machine process - then they're much better able to relax and do their thing vs. feeling nervous because they know you're watching them but they don't know why.

Annnnd it could simply be what you look like. Facial bone structure, eyes, jawline, hair etc. There could be some things you can't change about it, and others you could if you made an effort to - but we'd have to see pics to be able to comment.


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29 Mar 2013, 7:33 am

In my experience, subtle little things determine how people react, even if you are just quiet and trying to be nice. It's as if they look at my face when having a conversation, and within a few milliseconds don't see something they expect to see and from then on react in a more distanced way.



Cafeaulait
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29 Mar 2013, 8:49 am

I don´t really know. Do you make no/to intense eye contact? Do you make inappropriate comments?



Drehmaschine
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29 Mar 2013, 9:04 am

billiscool wrote:
Drehmaschine wrote:
I don't know why but for some reason I creep out people. It's been this way when I was little, when I went to Gymnasium, University and now at work. I can tell people are uncomfortable around me even though I don't say anything or do anything wrong and don't get in people's space. During break, I like to watch the other machines and see how they work, but some of the operators seem to be afraid of me. I've been told when I was in school that I remind people of a serial killer. Does anyone else experience this and if so, what should I do to not be the creepy guy?


wow, I feel sorry for you. What do you look like, sadly people judge people by their looks.

I look average. Bald with slightly sunken in eyes.



Drehmaschine
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29 Mar 2013, 9:09 am

Cafeaulait wrote:
I don´t really know. Do you make no/to intense eye contact? Do you make inappropriate comments?

I avoid looking at people because it is too uncomfortable. I don't speak much at all and I don't say anything inappropriate. Normally I can manage to say a handful of words and even then it is laboured.

goldfish21 wrote:
It could be the lack of eye contact, if you tend to do that. Might help to try making eye contact more often.

It could be an "expressionless," face if you tend to do that. Might help to smile or look interested/curious - practice these things in front of a mirror so you don't come across as looking even creepier with a forced smile.

It could just be your body language, or lack thereof, if you tend to stand motionless and stare at whatever you're interested in.

It could be the lack of conversation or transparency about what you're doing. People hate being watched while they work, but if they know why you're hanging around and watching something - because you're interested in the machine process - then they're much better able to relax and do their thing vs. feeling nervous because they know you're watching them but they don't know why.

Good ideas. I could probably try to have more expression.



Cafeaulait
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29 Mar 2013, 5:14 pm

Drehmaschine wrote:
Cafeaulait wrote:
I don´t really know. Do you make no/to intense eye contact? Do you make inappropriate comments?

I avoid looking at people because it is too uncomfortable. I don't speak much at all and I don't say anything inappropriate. Normally I can manage to say a handful of words and even then it is laboured.

goldfish21 wrote:
It could be the lack of eye contact, if you tend to do that. Might help to try making eye contact more often.

It could be an "expressionless," face if you tend to do that. Might help to smile or look interested/curious - practice these things in front of a mirror so you don't come across as looking even creepier with a forced smile.

It could just be your body language, or lack thereof, if you tend to stand motionless and stare at whatever you're interested in.

It could be the lack of conversation or transparency about what you're doing. People hate being watched while they work, but if they know why you're hanging around and watching something - because you're interested in the machine process - then they're much better able to relax and do their thing vs. feeling nervous because they know you're watching them but they don't know why.

Good ideas. I could probably try to have more expression.


Ok. I think not looking at other people/avoiding eyecontact can be the thing that makes others feel unconfortable.



Drehmaschine
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30 Mar 2013, 1:56 pm

Cafeaulait wrote:
Drehmaschine wrote:
Cafeaulait wrote:
I don´t really know. Do you make no/to intense eye contact? Do you make inappropriate comments?

I avoid looking at people because it is too uncomfortable. I don't speak much at all and I don't say anything inappropriate. Normally I can manage to say a handful of words and even then it is laboured.

goldfish21 wrote:
It could be the lack of eye contact, if you tend to do that. Might help to try making eye contact more often.

It could be an "expressionless," face if you tend to do that. Might help to smile or look interested/curious - practice these things in front of a mirror so you don't come across as looking even creepier with a forced smile.

It could just be your body language, or lack thereof, if you tend to stand motionless and stare at whatever you're interested in.

It could be the lack of conversation or transparency about what you're doing. People hate being watched while they work, but if they know why you're hanging around and watching something - because you're interested in the machine process - then they're much better able to relax and do their thing vs. feeling nervous because they know you're watching them but they don't know why.

Good ideas. I could probably try to have more expression.


Ok. I think not looking at other people/avoiding eyecontact can be the thing that makes others feel unconfortable.

I tried both last night and it seemed to be better than the last experience, but this was also a different person. He even let me help him run parts and explained everything. I could only stand to make indirect eye contact and only for a few seconds. That's still hard.



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11 Apr 2013, 6:53 pm

I have the same problem OP, I think its because of my anxiety, because a few years ago no one EVER called me a "creep".

When my anxeity got worst I started getting called that name, which started in my early 20s.

OP been getting called that since he was little :(