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TheSleepyOne
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26 Apr 2013, 7:00 pm

Is it weird that I want to socialize and make friends but when someone invites me somewhere I end up saying no?



hyksos55
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26 Apr 2013, 7:27 pm

It may be weird but I am sure it's common. I know I fall into that category and when I do actually say yes and go somewhere I end up regretting it.


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Persevero
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26 Apr 2013, 7:27 pm

Short answer: Yes.

I'm no good at social events, but I go if I'm invited because it's a friendly thing to do - it's the easiest way of telling people you like spending time with them.

Friendships require an effort on your part, you're not entitled to them.



hyksos55
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26 Apr 2013, 7:30 pm

Persevero wrote:
Friendships require an effort on your part, you're not entitled to them.


That is true that is why I keep trying even if its difficult sometimes.


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Mitrovah
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26 Apr 2013, 9:09 pm

hyksos55 wrote:
Persevero wrote:
Friendships require an effort on your part, you're not entitled to them.




there is a degree of truth to all that said but what if you are the person who people never go out of their way to invite you . you always have to be the one to as I would call it.
This may sound shallow but i always seem to be the one who has to beg to hang out with people and yet people who I have nothing in common with like people who party drink, smoke and are kind of really weird, to the point they are really disagreable even for NTs.
"I call it begging for other people's attention"



daydreamer84
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26 Apr 2013, 10:11 pm

hyksos55 wrote:
It may be weird but I am sure it's common. I know I fall into that category and when I do actually say yes and go somewhere I end up regretting it.


me too.



ASDsmom
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27 Apr 2013, 7:53 pm

"Weird" is just a label. Is it typical behaviour? No but common enough and I fit into this category. For me, it's the anxieties that hold me back. I WANT to be social but if I'm uncomfortable with my company, I am not myself. Then, I spend too much time dissecting all of the akward moments, thereafter, which affect my anxieties further. So, is it worth it for me? NO. Luckily, I have my own social style that works. I have key friends I can rely on from time to time (not often enough, I'm sure) and a wonderful wife and child. That keeps me social "enough" .. :)