Ballroom Dancing: Should I Disclose That I Have AS?

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WFurman
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02 May 2013, 4:46 pm

I have been attending ballroom dance parties at a studio close to where I live. Although I have an interest in ballroom dancing and believe that I am becoming better in the individual steps, I struggle with the social aspect of the parties. Whereas for others can have conversations fluently; naturally; and nonstop, I have difficulty thinking about the topics to talk about, and, therefore, am silent at times during the dances.

Unfortunately, this is not the first time this has happened, and I was wondering if the time has come if I should inform (at least some of) the instructors of the studio (who double as professional dance hosts for the evening) that I have AS. Even though this may be difficult to do, I believe that there might be a sense of relief afterwards.

Please let me know what your thoughts are.



redrobin62
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02 May 2013, 5:12 pm

It's interesting, this business of disclosure. Depending on who you're talking to, their reaction could be, "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Well, you're still a winner in my eyes."

My own experience, however, has all been negative. I get people not writing to me anymore to total disbelief, and I'm talking about from family members, too.



tcorrielus
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05 May 2013, 8:07 pm

I think it depends on how well and how long you have known the persons for.

Now if you're looking for conversation topics to talk about, you can ask you dance partners how is work, school or life going and maybe, talk about ballroom dance and sports with them. I'm sure they will ask you the same in return.



ASDsmom
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05 May 2013, 11:16 pm

Why not practice your social skills instead? It may be a relief for you to tell them (maybe) but it's not going to solve your problem. What you don't want is for people to either feel sorry for you or feel so akward, they will alienate you. Work on those social skills. Having ASD is a reason for your lack of skills but it's not an excuse. You don't want to use it as an excuse with your new social group.



Geekonychus
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06 May 2013, 11:22 am

ASDsmom wrote:
Why not practice your social skills instead? It may be a relief for you to tell them (maybe) but it's not going to solve your problem. What you don't want is for people to either feel sorry for you or feel so akward, they will alienate you. Work on those social skills. Having ASD is a reason for your lack of skills but it's not an excuse. You don't want to use it as an excuse with your new social group.


Great advice here. ^^^

Don't disclose to someone unless they are close friends/family you know you can trust.