staring

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ok so I was walking out today(this is a daily occurrence by the way) and when I notice people are looking at me I make eye contact with them and each time i do, they smile,it happens often with women more than men. I don't get it, why are they smiling and staring for that matter? The only reason I can think of is because of my full beard, which i try to keep neat as much as possible and i think i do a fair job, so I dont think it is because I look like a fool.

they are just being polite. smile back.

but it keeps happening and its driving me crazy, women have been looking at me especially and it is really getting annoying because i don't understand why they are looking at me and what it means when they are smiling or smile when i make eye contact

People smile when you make eye contact because they are being polite (it's like saying "hello") or because they are trying to break the awkwardness of making eye contact with a stranger. Women do the smile thing more often than men because they are taught to be nicer and more accommodating to strangers than men are. I wouldn't make much of it.

Are they actually staring at you (i.e. looking at you for a long time, especially from a distance) or are you catching them just briefly looking at your face? If it's the latter, that's normal, especially when you are walking out and about. People look at each other when they pass by to acknowledge that they're there.

Most of the time it is when I "catch them" staring

As good portion of the time I think they are already smiling before I "catch them"

I'm not trying to be funny or anything, but.... are you fairly handsome ?
The reason I ask is because there is a certain young man who I had/have a crush on but haven't seen for over a year.
I'd look at him a lot (couldn't help it) and smile, and I know he caught me doing it several times.
I think it kind of annoyed him, but only realised why after I moved house and never saw him again.

:-p He probably thought I was staring at him in a "what a freak" sort of way and inwardly sniggering at him.
He went to the same school as I used to go to, and the environment there is not healthy regarding bullying.
He has Aspegers (diagnosed) and certainly would have had a horrible time in school because of people staring and sniggering at him because of it I reckon.

I was uhhhh... trying to flirt, or else just couldn't help gawping at him. He really is hot stuff ! :-p
It was embarrassing as all hell when I was caught staring but I never knew until too late, that it could be interpreted in the way that I think he did.

I don't know I have never had a girlfriend or ever touched a woman so I don't know if it is because I'm some how attractive

Consider yourself lucky. When I walk out, all I get is glares from people when I make eye contact, even if I give them a friendly smile as I make eye contact. It's as though I have some sort of vibe what says ''do not smile or speak to me because I am that worthless''. I thought a smile was a smile though, whether I look nervous or not. If a shy-looking person walked by me and gave me a smile, I would instinctively smile back. It's just politeness.

The usual cliche crap I get when I say about this are:-

''Maybe they're having a bad day''

''Maybe you give them an intimidating stare or cheesy grin''

And I can assure you that neither of those are necessarily true, especially the latter. I know how to smile for f**k sake, and I'm not a starey type of person anyway. The former might be true for some, but not for every person I pass. Anyway, I'm often having a ''bad day'', but if a stranger walks past and smiles, it really cheers me up. It's called being friendly.

I get so confused!

The problem is men and women look and smile when I make eye contact but I do t know if it is because I look silly that is my biggest worry. Apparently all my life I have taken causal dress to new levels and I have no idea what looks good and or bad. I wear clean hole less shirts but the choice and combination always seems to be wrong no matter how hard I try to think like a neurotupicalcwhen it comes to "style" I also have this problem when a an aquiantance says I look good, I take it as a polite lie through the teeth.

I seriously doubt you look silly. I've never been to Iowa so I can't tell how nice the people are there, but maybe people in your area are just friendly and like to look and smile at strangers? I've been various places where strangers will smile and acknowledge you when you walk by and also places where they give you an evil stare for even looking at them.

As for dressing, I wouldn't stress so much about 'style.' Personally, I just wear what's comfortable and don't care what people think of it. True friends will like you for who you are and not base anything off of how you dress or look. The only people I've ever known to get laughed at over how they dress are people who wear the same two or three shirts all the time or people who wear their pajamas to the store, to class, etc.

that is exactly what I do, i just am really getting tired of all this staring and trying to figure out if it is because I look like a goof.

If they smile when they look at you then it's not really anything against you. I have people look at me but don't smile, even if I do. Instead they just glare or look at me funny as though I'm some sort of freak walked along. Sometimes I've had people give odd reactions when being near me, like teenage girls literally standing right in front of me just to stare right at me, then scuttle off back to their friends. Touch wood, I haven't had teenagers act oddly with me for quite a while now, but I still occasionally catch people sniggering or staring at me funny or whatever. I will never know why, because I may be an Aspie but not really on the outside. I know how to appear normal, with dressing, posture and body language. I've even been told that I look more confident than I used to, by close relatives who I trust. I'd rather have people smiling at me than glaring at me.