Do others typically invest more into you than vice versa?

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This is about social interactions in general, be they on the level of family, friends, acquaintances, co-workers, et cetera.

My question is, do other people have to 'work hard' to grab your attention and keep it when socially interacting with you? For instance, if you're in the beginning stages of an acquaintance, do you let the other party initiate the questions and other social niceties?
I find that this very much holds for me. It is for this reason that I actually best get along with people who are 'people persons', i.e. people who usually are everyone's friend, and who have great social skills and empathy. It must come across to many people that I'm hyper-aloof and even uninterested, when this is not necessarily so; I simply don't put myself in the position of the 'contact initiator', and even when contact between us has been established, there is no guarantee that it will be sustained.

I find that, often, a certain person has to keep re-connecting and re-establishing the rapport that we share, and I can imagine that this takes quite some work for that person. I would go as far as saying that anyone who has managed a friendly relationship with me after my 20th year of age, is likely a person of great patience, and perseverance- (not to mention kindness for wanting to be in my company in the first place.) What I'm saying is, a lot of the two-way road in the initial contact of my relationship has been from the other party's side, with me giving only a little bit back... BUT once the relationship has been solidified, it's a very strong bond, with an equal back-and-forth.

Anyone's experiences?

In my family, I don't want anything they would give me, and they very vocally don't want anything I would give them. When my social tolerance is high, I race out into the room where they are laughing and carrying-on and do a little small-talk routine like saying a silly joke, and then I wander away slowly enough to let them know that I am still paying attention but I have somewhere else to be, specifically, in my room.

It's amazing what you can get away with with an NT type person. If one does something nice for you, just reminding the person that you remember and are grateful for what they did is often enough. If they do a lot of things for you, that just means there's more material to use, and I find that I really am grateful for their help, so I keep it honest.

It's often important to get the face expressions on cue. After the person has made eye contact with you, glance at them and flash a quick smile at them and then stop focusing so hard. NT's tend to not like to be surprised by the "he's already watching and has a creepy smile on his face" routine that is so common with people on the spectrum who are trying to be friendly. Ever since I started using this technique, NT people tend to be much more receptive to conversation.

To the question of whether people have to work hard to get my attention, I'd have to say I have no idea.
I have learned to tell people, in a very kind way, that no matter how much time apart we may have, I will still be their friend just as much. This is an alternative (nice) way of saying that I'm a friendly person with AS who likes to discuss things I'm interested in and have no real care about who I'm discussing those things with. Also it's no less honest, and it usually makes NT people more emotionally attached to me.
I don't know, maybe I'm misunderstanding the question.

I've had a pal since middle of grade 9 - whatever age that made me, I'm not going to do the math atm. He still accuses me from time to time of not making enough effort/initiating enough.

And family says it too sometimes.

It seems to me that initiating carries a lot of responsibility/decisions and I become overwhelmed. My default mode is I will be friendly and take equal responsibility if someone else makes the original decisions. Some people have been offended that I never call them or suggest getting together. There is just something very stressful about initiating. Where are you going, how are you going to get there, what time, what day, what is the back-up plan if the original falls through? I have also had people get mad and say, we wouldn't have this problem if you had not wanted to ....