How would someone make you their friend?

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Mordy
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20 Feb 2007, 1:42 pm

How would someone make you their friend? or to say it another way are things a person would do that would make you want to be friends with them?



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20 Feb 2007, 2:11 pm

Mordy wrote:
How would someone make you their friend? or to say it another way are things a person would do that would make you want to be friends with them?


They don't try for my attention. They are secure with themselves. They do not come on too strongly and show interest in me or my interests. As well, we may share things in common.

The things that bother me are when people basically "beg" me to hang out or constantly want to be entertained or need constant attention. This is when *I'm* expected to put on a hat and entertain or give "undivided attention."

I once had a friend say, after we ended up doing nothing all night, that "it was boring" and that he "should have hung out with his other friends." I told him "Thats nice to say. Thanks for the suggestions for this evening (he made none). Next time, hang out with your other friends." I don't like him, anymore. A lot of my friends do not.



larsenjw92286
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20 Feb 2007, 2:25 pm

They would talk to you, and be nice to you.


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20 Feb 2007, 5:59 pm

larsenjw92286 wrote:
They would talk to you, and be nice to you.


I'd say 'kind.' Nice can be "manipulative" :wink:



MrMark
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20 Feb 2007, 6:13 pm

By taking the inititive, but not ringing my phone.


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larsenjw92286
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20 Feb 2007, 6:17 pm

I apologize!


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20 Feb 2007, 6:22 pm

The last one walked my dog every day. I kind of had to invite her in. Then she turned out to have similar values, and she gets my jokes. Also she's pleasant.

Without some kind of 'other' reason, I don't think anybody's get to know me at all.



Candymanic
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20 Feb 2007, 6:29 pm

A degree of understanding and tolerance, an interest in what i'm interested in, a kind and considerate personality. Oh, and needs a good sense of humor :p



RainSong
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20 Feb 2007, 10:14 pm

Acceptance of what I like (time alone, space, ect), a few shared interests/topics, and (to actually make me their friend) determination and patience. A sweet, quiet person is preferable, but I noticed that I tend to befriend the loud, fun people.


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20 Feb 2007, 10:21 pm

Someone told me a friend is someone you can be around, and who remembers you when you're not around. That is the best definition of a friend I've seen so far. To be someone's friend then, you would have to a) go out of your way to be around them and b) remember them when they are not around. These are things that can be done intentionally, especially at first during a friendship, but I have a hunch that a major part of the excitement in friendship comes from realizing that you are doing these things after the fact.



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21 Feb 2007, 12:51 am

My definition of friendship can be easily summed up in a famous saying: "a friend in need is a friend indeed". Many people can be fun for going out and having fun with, but a true friend would also come through for me when I'm having serious problems.



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21 Feb 2007, 1:34 am

I doubt I could ever have enough trust to let anyone close to me again. The only ties I have to my family are financial (I have no money). I've learned, time and again that I can't trust them in any other way. How in the hell could I trust a complete stranger?


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