I have absolutely no friends

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Haven't had friends in over 14 years. Zero. The ones I had in school (middle and high school) weren't real friends and treated me like crap. I think people made efforts in the last few years but I totally missed it. I have nothing in common with anyone. People think I'm weird or eccentric unless I'm fake, and I can't keep up with the fake persona for long.

No one cares about any of the things I'm interested in, and I don't care about what interests them. I don't care about modern music, 95 percent of tv programs, celebrities, nearly all movies. I don't care about gossiping, most fashion, talking about people's kids. I don't have a very feminine sort of personality compared to many women. And I don't have a masculine one either.

I want to talk about science, anthropology, cooking, physical fitness, anything I enjoy doing, in a logical and reasonable manner. I'll talk about a lot of other subjects, as long as they aren't silly or pointless. I don't want to talk about the weather or team sports. I don't like stupid people generally (sorry, I know it's mean) and have difficulty talking with them.

Most people I find to be boring and illogical. They have strong opinions over things they know nothing about and can't back up their opinions with any sound arguments.

I am just sick and tired of being friendless. Every once in awhile I meet someone really interesting and I'm so thrilled to have a real conversation.

The situation feels quite hopeless.

Good thing that's at least somewhat over with. People here love discussing the humanities, that's part of why I stick around. Apparently the chameleon is an ersatz mascot for patriarchy smashers around here, you would seem to fit in better than you probably think.

I've had no friends for over eight years now. Looking back, the friends I once had often manipulated and exploited me for being too laid back. If they said "Jump", I would say "How high?"

It's disappointing for me personally that I wasn't diagnosed with HFA earlier.

Although the transition from adolescence to adult is difficult for many, I do believe it's even more difficult for those on the spectrum.

I am 26 in May and still feel no older than 16. I collect stickers for sticker albums; I watch and enjoy Disney films and I sleep with a hot water bottle when the nights are at their coldest. In many respects it's probably for the best that I don't have friends. They would only deride me for my immaturity.

Sounds like what you need is to become a lecturer at a University and a gym instructor in your off hours. Or a lecturer on physical education. Then you'll have lots of opportunities to talk about science and fitness with like-minded people. Or at the very least you'll be getting paid to rant and rave about those things.

Yeah, yeah. Easier said than done. But it's not impossible. At least not in theory. Admittedly I'm talking out of my ass here. But it's an idea, ain't it?

I have no real friends either. God dammit.

I'm in a similar boat to you. Very few people in my age range share my interests and I've had no friends for 10 years now. I'm not good in social situations at all and have major anxiety issues in regards to them.

Haven't you noticed that people here like to talk about these things?

It's not a lost cause. Do you live in a college town?

You've described me to a T, OP. There are many others like you here that enjoy a nice conversation that doesn't involve celebrities, the weather or any other topic someone would bring up when talking to a stranger at a bus stop. Here's a comic I saw the other day, maybe it will give you a laugh. Comic

Jake- Nothing wrong with collecting stickers. Seems like a dying hobby sadly as I've not seen a sticker book in years. My favorite sticker used to be a scratch and sniff smiling taco

One of my special interests is the weather

Most people's idea of talking about something "in a logical and reasonable manner" seems to be basically to agree with them. They state their opinion, and you state yours, end of the story. Attacking their arguments is rude and offensive, and, conversely, they don't bother to examine yours: they consider your conclusions and decide whether they accept them or not, without caring how you came to them.

The more you try to reason with them, the more they'll accuse you of wanting to impose your views on them and the angrier and more defensive they'll get.



Having strong opinions and refusing to be rational about them is a good way to assert your personality or your allegiance to a group which shares them, and to make it clear you're willing to fight for your right to hold them against anyone who'd try to change them. They don't need to care whether you want to change their opinions because they're irrational; the important point is their defiance to any such attempt. It's a matter of defending their territory.

This approach wouldn't be so widespread if it hadn't been favored by natural selection. To survive and reproduce successfully, you don't need to convince someone rationally if you can persuade them to accept your biases, or simply beat the crap out of them for getting in your way.



I suspect most people disagree with your concept of a "real" conversation, and may be offended by it.

I hope so. I'm not exactly an expert on any one topic though, like most people I've seen on here. I tend to get obsessed over things within my major areas of interest, then suddenly lose interest for no apparent reason, so I know a little about a lot of things. Maybe it's ADHD (quite hyperactive as a child)...but I don't know

It's an interesting idea, but I have arthritis (it's a kind young people get, autoimmune in nature). I'm kinda limited in what I can do as a result. And I'm not that obsessed about fitness, I just like to be healthy and look good.



I have this problem with my family. I state my opinions about a subject, mention research I have done, studies, journal articles, etc. Then they say "I don't believe that." No arguments to back it up, no challenging points I have made, no research or evidence of their own, just "I don't believe that." End of story. They believe what they want and refuse to even listen to an alternative point of view, whereas I am open-minded and enjoy getting alternative viewpoints as long as they are based on some kind of evidence or explanation.



I believe you are correct.

Nothing wrong with stickers. I still watch children's cartoons and enjoy them, and play videogames (if I have time). I'm over 30 and feel about 20 at the most.

Ilovesnails, that comic is hilarious

Kraftiekortie, I am in a college town, but not exactly college-aged. I find that many people who claim to share my interests are very pretentious. I used to go to school for art, a lot of those kids were "fake eccentric"; they were weird on purpose in order to be what they viewed as nonconformist and edgy. But they were not truly eccentric, it was an act and really annoying. I hate fakes.

It was the weather that got me into being an artist. There's a weather website, wunderground.com, that has a photo section. In the old days, people used to rate photos from 1 to 10. Plus, you would get to see exotic landscapes and people's neighborhoods from all over the world showing the current weather (photos had to be taken within the past seven days). That website gave me ideas on where to travel, and I started posting photos because I wanted to see how high I would score. Now I'm an artist specializing in landscapes and nature ... basically, they're all weather images.

Weather doesn't have to be small talk. The only time weather is boring is when NTs complain about it.

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What kind of art are you into, Yigeren?

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I have no real life friends either and haven't for some time. I try to make some connections online, but it gets me nowhere 99% of the time, so I guess that ain't an option anymore. I did feel like making some connections and to feel a sense of belonging but perhaps that's just wishful thinking. I, like you, have very little interest in what most others enjoy associating with, apart from sports that is. I don't know why but I find it hard to do Mainstream. Most people need to be associated with popular culture though, so it reduces my chances. You could say that I should make friends with other misfits, and outcasts but I've tried, and it's gotten me nowhere as well. But it ain't so bad. I don't mind being on my own to be honest. For example, I'll happily go to the movies by myself, if there were anything decent to watch.

Maybe I'm just hard to please. When I did have people around me, I complained about the drama and prejudices that came with them. Now I complain about feeling left out lol.

Sorry, when I say I don't want to talk about the weather I mean complain about it, or use it as small-talk. I actually wouldn't mind a real discussion about weather in a scientific way. Like the causes behind weather patterns, etc. That would not bore me.



I really like abstract art, geometric designs, experimenting with shapes and color. I can do realism very well, on paper or canvas. I like ceramics, but I'm not very good at throwing pottery, coiling is easier. I like to just make things out of things people normally throw away. I like to study random things, like garbage bins or other common objects, and see beauty in their design or shapes. I like taking photographs, but I have no fancy equipment. I just love to make things. I'm very good with my hands. But these past few years I have been stressed and depressed. So I don't create, because inspiration for me comes when I am happy or relaxed.

When I was little, I began drawing as a baby in my highchair. I drew constantly for years. It was my special interest and I did it for myself, it was even a way of playing for me. But my dad used to yell at me for it, because he said it was useless. My parents had fights about it. He wanted me to be interested in what he liked. Eventually I became discouraged. I gradually stopped creating and didn't begin again until college. Then I tried to go to school for it, but hated it. I wasn't creating for me, it was for a grade, or to make a living. It was competitive, there were deadlines, and it was stressful and no fun.