Neighbor being short with me

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Earlier this evening I was outside on my way back from a convenience store near my condo complex when I ran into a neighbor at the mail center. I asked her what I was doing for Christmas because I was being polite. She said that she was not sure yet. I told her that I did not celebrate Christmas and said that a few friends were coming over for Chinese and old Star Wars movies. I also said that I was going to go to the store and get a big tv (since I need one) and a vcr (I meant to say DVD player). She ended the interaction with me by being short.

"Well good luck merry Christmas." She then walked back to her car really fast while she left my mouth hanging.

Was there something wrong with what I said?

She is usually pretty nice to me too.

Don't take this too seriously.

I would bet that she was probably in a hurry to get somewhere.

I also wonder if she was parked badly, and had to get back to her car.

1. It's raining and thundering here
2. She parked directly in front of the mail center
3. I thought that drove off a little mad.

I thought maybe I gave away too many details or something.

If anything you said made her angry, then she has a problem.

I would go with: she was in a hurry.

I think you got it right. Most women really aren't your friend. Even though she always seems to be "friendly" to you, that's just the way NTs are. She probably didn't like listening to you talk about getting a new big TV either - women are jealous of other women. I don't know if men are the same.

It doesn't make sense for someone to be angry when someone else tells you that he/she bought a new TV.

If someone told you you got a new TV, would you get mad? I certainly hope not!

Other people's time is sacred. Just because you have to be ready to waste as much of your own time on demand as others please if you don't want trouble with them doesn't mean you can expect the same from them.

How a person acts doesn't have to make sense. I'm only telling you how women are. I had this woman neighbor that I met when I first moved in that was acting like she wanted to be friends. She knew I was single and had a cat. Then one day she asked me if she could drop off her two cats while she went on vacation. I declined saying that I didn't like Waldo being around other cats. From then on, she never spoke to me again, but she spoke about me to other neighbors in not such a good way. Like I said, most women don't want to be your friend.

That 20 yr+ friendship that I've talked about before was all because of jealousy. My ex friend Michelle said that De De was jealous of me and my job. Whatever. De De could have went to nursing school too, but she instead decided to go for her Masters in education and become a teacher. That she always wanted to be a nurse is not my problem. So instead of going back to school and doing what she really wants to do, she would rather spend her time being jealous and acting like an ass towards me. I'm not going to say that I never get jealous, but if someone has something I would like to have, then I try to do what I have to to get it. I don't go out of my way to wreck a friendship just out of jealousy.

I've worked around mostly women and I've lived around a lot of women and I've never been able to really trust any of them. A 20+ year friendship gone, another 10 year friendship on the rocks and I have no idea what I did and now I'm down to only one friend - Julia and that's probably because we're both religious and have a lot of the same beliefs. There is another woman that I work with that I actually feel I can trust and it's funny, but a lot of the other women at work don't like her and talk about her behind her back. She's a little different, but that just means she's an original. NT women are shallow - if there's anything about you they don't like and you don't fit in, they will act like they like you then talk about how weird you are after you're gone. I see it all the time.

I attract lightning.
So if it's raining and I hear thunder,
and you're talking to me outside,
I'm going to be short with you.
Because of my healthy fear of lightning.

That said, talking about Christmas plans
can get ugly fast ...
same thing has happened to me more than once.

Seems everybody wants you to celebrate the perfect Hallmark Card Christmas
with a smiling family opening presents around a tree.

I celebrate Christmas by going to church.
I no longer go home for the holidays.
Maybe someday I will go back home for holidays ...
when there's more peace in my family.

Just telling somebody I don't go home for Christmas
is enough to upset an NT.

...

I know what you're saying, Angela.

But this was just a casual encounter in the mail place with a virtual stranger, who had no reason to be jealous of the OP.

It wouldn't make sense for this person to be angry at the OP. The fact that she said "Merry Christmas" after the OP said she doesn't celebrate Christmas indicates that she was distracted because she was in a hurry.

To be honest, though, I don't think one should tell a stranger that one doesn't celebrate Christmas. That's "sharing" too much.

People can get angry, mad, jealous
anytime you tell them good or happy news,
no matter how innocent you think it is.
Even when you're sharing your good news
because you've heard that NTs don't like negativity.

I've learned not to talk about my success with art at work
unless I don't mind the consequences
such as people avoiding me
or giving me the silent treatment.

I would be happy for you if you got a new TV.
I hope Santa brings you one if it's on your list.

...

I don't know....I don't think people are that vicious. If they are, the world's really screwed up.

If you told me about your art accomplishments, I would be glad. I can't do art to save my life; I might be a little envious of your talent for this. But I wouldn't use it against you. And I don't believe most people would, either. I think there are people who might be "phony" about this--that's the extent of it, though.

Religious beliefs have a lot to do with friendships, especially nowadays.
If people don't share the same beliefs about celebrating Christmas,
this can cause friction ...
and yes, that's very sad.

It seems that the OP and the neighbor who was short with her
might have different beliefs regarding Christmas?
That could explain things.

...

Well, in the OP's case, as well as in mine, I think it's a combination of
different religious or holiday beliefs and jealousy over some good news ...
But also it's been mentioned that the neighbor just might have been in a hurry ...
it could all just be as simple as that.

And kraftie,
you seem to have a certain innocence about you then.
And you are very kind to me, thank you.

I could name names about what's happened to me at work ...
but of course I won't.
I could also post a link to a blog post by Chris Guillebeau
called "What They Say About Winners" ...

Click Here to Read "What They Say About Winners"

Here's a sample:

This quote from Hugh MacLeod puts it well:

“To get a lot of people to hate you, all you need to do is make a lot of money doing something you love.”

You can also replace “make a lot of money” with any number of other phrases that reflect success:

“...all you need to do is have a lot of fun....”
“...all you need to do is help a lot of people...”
“...all you need to do is be better than everyone else...”

...

Last edited by the_phoenix on 23 Dec 2015, 10:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.

They aren't actually strangers - the OP said they were neighbors. Saying Merry Christmas is etiquette in NT Land, Mr. K. People will still act neighborly even if they really want nothing to do with you. There's a difference between being angry and being jealous.

I said "virtual" stranger.

It's true, though......neighbors could range from being intimate friends to total strangers.

I guess, in essence, that we weren't there---so we're only speculating.

But if a person has so much jealousy in his/her heart that he/she wouldn't feel pleasure, at all, in somebody being happy, then I wouldn't want to be that person. I wouldn't want to spend the rest of my life like that. I would feel like life is worthless.

I'm not the greatest guy in the world, but I'm not the worst, either. I would feel really, really good if somebody accomplished something--especially if I assisted in that accomplishment.