When is "Lets Get Coffee" just being polite?

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A friend of mine, platonic, said lets get coffee. "Oh my god, brilliant, I would love to! Fantastic!". Their response was "Great!".

So, I asked if I should send some dates but I gathered we were going to discuss it next time we met.

We met, and never discussed it.

It's been suggested that "lets get coffee" is just a friendly gesture that doesn't mean anything and is just polite. It's not a genuine offer.

Oh come on! Where do you draw the line? How do you know when something is a genuine offer or just being polite? I mean if it's a genuine offer, I should chase it up right? But if it's not a genuine offer I should forget about it. If I chase up something that isn't a genuine offer I come across as stalkerish and clingy. But if I don't chase up something that is a genuine offer, then I might miss out on a genuine friendship opportunity and a way to connect.

Am I supposed to be passive?

Tell me while Im waiting to get diagnosed, whether this is perfectly normal to think to this extent, or whether this Aspieish?

That's easy to answer...

Sometimes. Sometimes not.

I think sometimes, when the intent isn't quite clear, it can be that the other person is expecting you to take the initiative. They're throwing the idea out there to see how enthusiastic you are. Sometimes.

That's about the sum of my wisdom on that question!

In a similar discussion a while ago we were talking about people using words in a way where the words aren't actually the main part of the message. When someone says "OK", it might as well be a meow or oink, because the message is all in tone of voice, facial expression and body language. I find greetings especially baffling at times, and farewells even worse.

Genuine offer of what? Coffee.

The only euphemism I know is if someone invites you "up/in for coffee" after a date.

Coffee as an industry is not polite but hackers full of coffee are.

Stop paying me plz WTF would I do with money today? Buy you an island? Send coordinates & it's done.

I'm putting a houseboat in both of the lakes down the street.

Learn to write Brainfuck & you can code better than Charlie. Time for me to go reprise it right now.

Yes, a genuine offer of coffee, or just a throw away polite gesture that means nothing and isn't serious. Like "lets catch up sometime". Or "I'll give you a call" I guess.

How do you know when someone is being genuine or just being polite? What stick me in my tracks unable to proceed ir fear or getting it wrong. If they're being polite and Im continually asking about the coffee, well Im wasting my time, building hope, setting myself up for resentment, annoying them, come across as clingy, needy, insecure. If they're being genuine and I don't ask about said coffee, they may have forgotten and think that I don't want coffee either and don't like them. Which isn't true. Fundamentally, I like everyone until they do something to annoy me.