No social life
I have never had a real friendship, maybe because of my lack of eye contact and my poor social skills. My therapist has always told me a friendship isn't just about having common interests, I don't get her anyway. its not like I can suddenly go out and socialise right now, but I am starting to see the importance. Ok in the event if I do make a friend, any tips on keeping the conversation going?
and also most kids love gossiping since I don't get the point of it so yep I get left out
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15 year old kid professionally diagnosed with ASD & ADHD
I am constantly thinking of multiple things at once, and if one is really interesting/funny, I tell it to the other person during a conversation. Especially if it relates to the topic. Sometimes they think it's cool and ask me for more details. Sometimes they tell me that it's really disturbing and the conversation ends. I think my funny things often go into the disturbing category. I don't always have something to say, but some is better than none.
Most of my conversations are started by someone else, so I guess a big part has already been done for me. But only a few have asked me to sit with them during lunch, and no-one's asked me over to their house.
I don't participate in gossip either. I don't feel left out, but that's just me.
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Life ... that's what leaves the mess. Mad people everywhere.
Mongoose1
Raven
Joined: 14 Feb 2016
Age: 59
Gender: Male
Posts: 105
Location: In an airbase in Shangri-La
Therapist, huh? Yeah, I've had dealings with a few of them. I've found over the years that the question one should ask is why go to someone who can't even keep things straight in their own lives? Enough said. Friendship is a conscious choice people make. You choose to like someone. It sounds corny, but it's true. Likewise, people choose whether or not to like you. I'm involved in a few social activities not so much because I'm a social person but because it offers a chance to interact with a society that I may not agree with but still need to live with. Likewise, I have connected with people like me through the internet that are geographically near me so that I can have social interaction - that's how I met my wife, by the way. It's sad, but we live in a works-riteousness society. But by joining some of the local activities, you will more than likely encounter people who may appreciate your finer qualities. But you need to do the reaching out.
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Currahee! We stand alone together!
I barely have one myself so I can't give very good advice. Chances are you're not alone and there is someone else out there who is just as desperate to make friends as you. I approached a girl that was sitting on her own who I had seen around before and we actually became good friends. We're still friends now. I introduced her to some of my other friends and it just happened that way. Now I just have a small group of friends which is better than when I started out at nothing. its also way easier to make friends online than in person so I just talk to people online and we become friends in real life too.
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diagnosed autistic since 2000♡
I have a few light friendships over the internet, but I don't really know if I've really had a very serious friendship outside of family. I think the advice of "keep reaching out" is good advice for sure. It's just kind of hard to really know where to start I think. There really isn't much else to do than try to reach out to people actually except wait for people to reach out to you. It sounds like you have school/work interactions, which is a good place to start I guess, and you can talk to lots of people on the net.
SparkyCosmos
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: 6 Mar 2016
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Posts: 192
Location: The Midnight Channel
Try to figure out what is most important to them, and keep their values in mind when trying to connect with them. Though don't let them push the values on you either if you don't feel as though it resonates with you. But still, try to understand their values regardless. People seem to love that.
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Diagnosed with Asperger's and OCD. Though the OCD is way more apparent than anything if you knew me in-person.
If you realize that all things change, there is nothing you will try to hold on to. If you are not afraid of dying, there is nothing you cannot achieve. - Lao Tzu
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