Tagalong sister at an otherwise male D&D group?

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CryingTears15
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05 Dec 2016, 8:16 pm

I love playing D&D. But I haven't gotten the opportunity unless it's with my brother and his friends. Recently, we started our own D&D group with five boys and me.

I am friends with the DM, but everyone in my school is. Then there is a boy who seems okay, a boy who seems very nice, and a boy who mocks me at one time and then seems okay with me another. Not that I'm going to act on it, but he...is relatively attractive. It makes what he says more uncomfortable. My brother says he's fine, though.

I know one boy was invited by another. I forgot how I got into it, I think I told DM I wanted to go. Maybe he let me because of my brother.

I laughed constantly the first time. I mean constantly. Something funny would happen, we'd all laugh, I'd be snickering randomly at it minutes later.

Recently, I stuttered as I do when I am nervous. I was trying to say, "Suspicious", it came out more: "Suspisoosoosoospisoo", said boy who mocks me said, "What?"

I looked at him.

"Suspiciosoosooso-spicious..."

By the end they seemed fine.

I feel like a killjoy at the group. My character fights, and is not useless, though maybe it's odd that she has a child, (that she abandoned). I talk about what they want to talk about, and I enjoy talking about that stuff.

How do I not feel like a tagalong sister? Thanks.



RetroGamer87
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06 Dec 2016, 3:26 am

You're not the killjoy. Honestly I think most boys would love to have a girl in their D&D group.


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Mr_Miner
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08 Dec 2016, 3:02 pm

Honestly teasing is what male friends to one another. So a hard time over a mispronounced word sounds right to me. You are already the girl and people have noticed that but you are "one of the guys" that type of women. But I don't think that means anyone has a problem with you. They invited you to the group and it sounds like you have a creative back story for your character. I have never played D and D but isn't that the point? To be able to do anything you want and be creative. So to me it sounds like you are fitting in with the norm.



Quiet Water
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08 Dec 2016, 6:57 pm

Traditionally, D&D groups are full of people who don't quite fit 'the norm' anyway. :wink: It sounds like you're already doing the first of two things you can do to not be or feel like a tag-along: create and play a competent character who is useful to the group. The second? Take a turn at DMing, if yours ever feels like he needs a break.

(You're not the first in this situation, and I wasn't either. D&D is for all of us who enjoy sword & sorcery fantasy.)



Summer_Twilight
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09 Dec 2016, 10:08 am

I play D&D too and the more I learn to play, the funnier everything gets. Most campaigns seems to come with having their own little inside jokes.



WaysOff
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13 Dec 2016, 9:10 am

Many D&D types are damned grateful if an actual real-life girl is there! Most of the time they'll be happy to have you (sometimes a little too happy, if you know what I mean). I guess the ideal is for you to be treated the same as a male n00b would be treated, and it sounds like that's what's happening.

You do get some misogynist types who never grew out of the "no grils aloud" phase. They are best avoided.



Bald-Accountant
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22 Dec 2016, 4:56 pm

I think most DMs love to have people who come regularly and contribute, so if you like it I would think, at least for the DM, that you would be a blessing rather than a third wheel.