Improving my personality.

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I really want to know how to transform myself into a likeable, confident person. I have been a very quiet person for my whole life and people find it easy to mess with me. This mainly happened due to autism but I want to change this. I need some helpful people in my life but just can't find any.

Any advice will be appreciated.

Hang out with people who share your interests. This will help because you have enthusiasm about your interests, and thus you will appear to others to have "personality."

Are you in college now?

Firstly, I want to praise you on your self awareness and willingness to improve. That’s the right minset, and I’m sure you’ll succeed. I will do my best to help as I’m currently in a similar position if trying to improve myself in order to improve relationships.

Firstly, what are your hobbies? What are your goals? What do you think is stopping you achieving your goals? What do you you currently like about yourself? Do you suffer from anxiety or depression? Have you had trouble in your past that has affected your confidence?

First step to a change is realizing that there is a problem, second is understanding what the problem is. Since you say you want to be likeable I suppose that means you don't think you're likeable now... why is that? What is the thing/what are the things that you think make you less likeable? I think that once you figure this one out then changing your personality to what you consider to be better will be easier.

Many autistic people have trouble with their social skills, even basic ones, so you might too. Same with body language. Keep an eye on other, well liked people and see how they do things and pick up ways that you think would suit you, too. Read books about how to improve your social skills and body language. Interract more with people than you do now, so you will get practice.

Remember, most people don't get results fast, so don't get depressed or give up if things don't start going the way you want them to in the time you want them to.

In my past I always used to get bullied and pushed around by people, I always lacked confidence and found it difficult to talk to people, I was always alone and very depressed.

The things that helped me were pushing my comfort zone, doing things I didn't feel comfortable with, I practiced talking to people online, on teamspeak and discord playing online games, I did voluntary work in my spare time, I was always very nervous at first and often felt embarrassed and inadequate, it was just allot of practice and over time I got better at it, and it became more comfortable.

Now people I meet think I'm confident, I'm good at standing up for myself, and I've dated without too many problems.

The important things that helped me change were learning to ignore negative comments, if something bad happened I'd put it behind me and carry on, I didn't let my failures stop me from trying again, and I removed people who were damaging from my life(haven't seen any of my family in years), it took a long time, but that's what worked for me.

Thanks everyone. I am really in a bad spot in life and nothing seems to improve. But I will keep trying and maybe someday I will find a way. My personality might never change they way I want but thanks for the ideas!

I bet you're a funny guy.

The job of Court Jester (aka "fool") was really an excellent career position under some medieval and Renaissance kings.

Haha what makes you say that? I am curious. Or was it some kind of sarcasm?

How can it be sarcasm? I've never met you.

It's because of your screen name, "Autistic Fool"

Oh I see. You are a funny guy too

Thank you, kind sir

The fool in a medieval court was the only guy who could tell it like it is to the king... without losing his head. A mighty place to be!

SEE Disussion thread: Daniel Wendler - Improve Your Social Skills!
https://wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=357001