Bragging

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When is it just exchanging information vs bragging?

One probably has to examine their motives. Are you trying to have what the Chinese refer to as Big Face or are you just sharing with a friend? I think that's a good guideline to use.

When giving advice, "How I Did It" is not bragging.

When putting others down, "How I Did It" is bragging.

The trouble arises when the people being advised had asked for advice when they really just wanted their feelings and opinions validated.

Advisee: "I can't get a date. Please Help!"
Advisor: "It's easy, all you have to do is ..." <*launches into a simple process that works more than half of the time>.
Advisee: "None of that helps. You're making me feel worse. I'm reporting you to the mods..."

I'll admit that I may sound like I'm bragging when I discuss certain things with people, especially when it comes to travelling. At the age of 24, I've already been to almost 20 countries - which, I'd imagine, is an uncommonly large number for someone as young as me. But I don't mean to brag with it.

And there's one specific experience I certainly don't mean to brag with whenever I discuss it, but then again, it's not an experience I've shared with many people in the first place. Only my parents and a select few friends know about it.

You're not bragging.

We can talk with a simple desire to share something awesome, and it can be perceived by others as bragging. I mean, every conversation involves two (or more) parties.

Therefore, I try to wait for someone to show interest in something about me, before launching into the whole story.

But people who truly love you won't think you're bragging unless you actually ARE bragging.

Strange ... when people talk about their experiences as victims of personal tragedy or trauma, everyone jumps in to offer advice and condolences ... but when people talk about their experiences as victors over personal tragedy or trauma, everyone jumps in with accusations of bragging and lies ...

I like to share my like experiences with people. To me that's my way of saying: "I can relate!"

They: "I went to Spain last spring."

Me: "I've been there too and absolutely loved it. Awesome memories, beautiful places. Barcelona, Madrid, Toledo, Monserrat. It was great." I would then go on about more specific fun memories assuming if THEY want to share details about their trip....they'll speak up.

I guess people expect that I should be asking them questions about their trip. Wrangle information from them for some reason.

I wonder if the other person views my way of conversing about like experiences I've had as bragging?

I've met with several people during the course of my work in their palatial homes. In both instances, they bragged about their wealth very obviously. I was utterly unimpressed. I think in both cases they must have picked up on that as their demeanor seemed to gradually seem less friendly.....yuck.

People like to have their egos stroked. I too am turned off by actions and words designed to enhance the other person's ego gratification.

But as to going on about YOUR experience in Spain - that's typical autistic yakking. It actually would be better to ask the other person about their trip, while mentioning yours. It could be a point of connection between the two of you.

I'm afraid I am admittedly very bad at asking other people more questions about a shared experience or commonality. It took many years for me to realize that asking a person a bunch of questions is a way that many people believe you're showing an interest in them. It's a bit of a weird concept to me because my brain thinks: "I'm talking to you. I don't normally like talking to most people. The fact that I'm talking to you means I'm interested in you and your topic."

None of you guys even come close to bragging.

While I don't care much for the boring minutia most people provide from trips and most of the other information is available online, I don't see it as bragging. Tedium? Yes. I don't want to hear every little thing your kid said or did....