How do people have more friends in adulthood?

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I used to be friends on social media with someone who I met at college. I used to see photos of her with friends at concerts, holidays, parties, having a whale of a time during her 20s and early 30s. Some of these friends three or four of whom I recognised because she would be out with these particular four one photo I saw was when they celebrated an graduation anniversary. It makes me think "why didn't I have the same number of friends and a social adult life like hers?" It makes me that she's lived the high life because she had quite an active social life and maintained friendships in adulthood after leaving university etc. It also makes me feel I've "missed out" by not having the similar experiences she's had.

I don't have any friends, none i don't know anyone either, I'm not joking.

Looking at other posts of yours here on Wrong Planet, I see that you have a strong interest in politics.

Have you ever been involved in any kind of political activism? If not, I would suggest that you do so. If you go about it in an appropriate way, it can have the side-effect of enabling you to find friends. (If you want to discuss more about how one can make friends through political activism, or the reasons why you feel that this wouldn't work for you, we should probably create a new thread in the "Politics, Philosophy, and Religion" section.)

Also, I notice that you live in the U.K. Because there are quite a few other Wrong Planet users who live in the U.K. too, you might be able to find some good potential friends here on Wrong Planet if you stick around long enough.

I think that the main thing about making friends as an adult is being intentional.

Now, you have your coworkers. However, unless you're in a certain specialism, chances are the only common ground you have is that you both want to earn money. That's not a great basis for a friendship. Although you might find a friend there.

You ideally want to find someone with a bit of common ground. So, consider your interests, but also consider perhaps branching out and trying something a bit different. Not entirely out of your comfort zone, but slightly out of left field.

If you have a friend already, then try inviting them out to do something every once in a while. Friendship goes both ways and if your friend is the only one that reaches out, then they'll be less inclined to keep the friendship going.

Also, a friend of a friend could be a potential friend of yours. That's not to say stalk your friend's friends and make them be friends with you. Rather, if your friend mentions their friend, then you could ask a couple of questions such as - what are they like? How did you meet? Are they into (interest)? This could potentially lead to an introduction. Not too many questions, mind you. Casual interest. Not an interrogation.

I don't have any friends as an adult either. Part of the problem is being single. The vast majority of guys my age are married and have families and they don't have time for single friends. If I invite them to do something, they can never do it because of family obligations and since I don't have a family, I never get invited to any of their stuff.

When we're young, we spend the majority of our time around peers of the same age (at school, uni etc). In our twenties, something shifts and friendships often stop, because we enter a very different phase of life. We work with people of all ages, we start long term relationships or even start families and there isn't much time for friendship. At least: not as much as we were used to. So we lose friends. I didn't manage to stay friends with many people from my school days but that was fine because I had nothing in common with them anymore. Some people remain friends for a lifetime and most don't.

I wouldn't compare your life to that of the friend you're comparing yourself with. Yes, she was surrounded by friends and did fun things, but that doesn't mean that she was happy necessarily. People are very good at pretending, especially on social media, so please don't feel like you missed out because you could be making her life a lot better in your head than it was in reality.