Board index › Coping in life › Social Skills and Making Friends

My social skills

Page 1 of 1 [ 11 posts ] 

Previous topic | Next topic

UtukXul
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 3 Mar 2008
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 132

07 Mar 2008, 7:55 pm

Can anyone help me out and point out my flaws I really need to get better at this.. Obviously lol..



aries
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 30 Dec 2007
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 318
Location: Berkshire, UK

07 Mar 2008, 8:03 pm

UtukXul wrote:
Can anyone help me out and point out my flaws I really need to get better at this.. Obviously lol..


How can we evaluate you over the internet?

I'd like this too but I don't know anyone around me who I could ask to do this for me.


_________________
I don?t have any friends at all
Cause I have nothing in common with ya?ll - Gnarls Barkley 'Whatever'


UtukXul
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 3 Mar 2008
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 132

07 Mar 2008, 8:06 pm

Well.. Many people here are very familiar with me.. So I figured I could get some suggestions :wink:



GoatOnFire
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2007
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,986
Location: Den of the ecdysiasts

07 Mar 2008, 8:09 pm

UtukXul wrote:
Well.. Many people here are very familiar with me.. So I figured I could get some suggestions :wink:


Are you the artist formerly known as username88?


_________________
I will befriend the friendless, help the helpless, and defeat... the feetless?


UtukXul
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 3 Mar 2008
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 132

07 Mar 2008, 8:14 pm

Sigh.. Yes :roll: Lol.. Im not the same guy I was believe me. Before I was just in a miserable environment, and it showed greatly and turned people off I know.. But now Im living in the company of friends and my life is drastically better all around.. But still.. I got my problems lol.. Like everyone I guess. I really want to get better with this though.



GoatOnFire
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2007
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,986
Location: Den of the ecdysiasts

07 Mar 2008, 8:18 pm

Ok, first tip. If we knew what you think the problems are it'd be helpful.


_________________
I will befriend the friendless, help the helpless, and defeat... the feetless?


UtukXul
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 3 Mar 2008
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 132

07 Mar 2008, 8:31 pm

Well.. I know that I can be completely my self full of flaws and all when Im around ana and jack with no problem.. Its just the fact that even though its great living with friends, I need someone to love me.. Like a gf, now more than ever. So the chances of me finding an aspie gf (someone who will accept me as an aspie) are close to nothing so I better try to make as many changes about my self as I can, so that rejection wont be so frequent anymore. Subconsciously I know that the way I am isnt always exactly "socially acceptable" by any means, but at the same time I cant really pin point exactly what I do thats wrong.. So I thought maybe someone would be able to point some things out from what they observe when I talk on here, and perhaps give me suggestions on how to better myself.
Maybe it was a pointless thing to even mention here, cause even though I have a lot to say on the forums its probably still not enough to make a good evaluation or anything.. But you never know I guess.



pakled
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Nov 2007
Age: 68
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,015

07 Mar 2008, 10:32 pm

everyone needs to be loved. It's not a bad thing to work on that. Just don't come across as a 'love sponge', sort of a needy type of person. Just keep your eyes open for opportunities, and play it cool. Good luck.



UtukXul
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 3 Mar 2008
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 132

07 Mar 2008, 11:09 pm

pakled wrote:
Just don't come across as a 'love sponge', sort of a needy type of person.
I know (for some reason) this is a huge turn off to people. But what if its true? How is that so bad? I know either way I have to hide it as best I can if I want to get anywhere.. But anyway yeah.



GoatOnFire
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Feb 2007
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,986
Location: Den of the ecdysiasts

08 Mar 2008, 12:04 am

UtukXul wrote:
Well.. I know that I can be completely my self full of flaws and all when Im around ana and jack with no problem.. Its just the fact that even though its great living with friends, I need someone to love me.. Like a gf, now more than ever. So the chances of me finding an aspie gf (someone who will accept me as an aspie) are close to nothing so I better try to make as many changes about my self as I can, so that rejection wont be so frequent anymore. Subconsciously I know that the way I am isnt always exactly "socially acceptable" by any means, but at the same time I cant really pin point exactly what I do thats wrong.. So I thought maybe someone would be able to point some things out from what they observe when I talk on here, and perhaps give me suggestions on how to better myself.
Maybe it was a pointless thing to even mention here, cause even though I have a lot to say on the forums its probably still not enough to make a good evaluation or anything.. But you never know I guess.


To be honest, odds are you won't find much good advice over the web. Maybe if you're lucky, someone will come up with a revealing insight about some detail but I myself have also tried to find an answer for why I am not socially acceptable & normally I don't get very many good responses. Occasionally, someone shooting in the dark hits something close enough to be worth a second thought. Maybe that alone makes it worth the try.

Quite frankly, I'm not the best person to ask. If you follow my example you won't have much success. That 'people don't like love sponges' thing reminds me of my law of human interaction. "Other people will always subconsciously be inclined to do exactly what you do not want them to do."


_________________
I will befriend the friendless, help the helpless, and defeat... the feetless?


UtukXul
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 3 Mar 2008
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 132

08 Mar 2008, 6:00 am

Yeah, those are some good points.