Girls

Post Reply New Topic

How can I tell if they are flirting with me, How much they like me, and when is an appropriate time to make a move?

it depends
it depends
and
it depends...

there's a few threads here even in the few short months I've been around describing body language, what to 'watch for', etc.

However

The only rule you can make about all women is that there's no rule that covers all women...

look around here, check the 'love and dating' forum, and see what makes sense. In the end, you'll have to take your chances like everyone (NT and AS) out there. Sometimes you'll win, sometimes you'll be turned down. It's not personal, it's just life. Hang in there...

Even "normal" people can't tell.

there are lots and lots of books on this subject but have different answers.

no one will ever be able to fully understand women...........
lol

Getting a woman seems to be very tricky. I don't have a girlfriend yet, but I wouldn't lose faith. I'd just take things slow. If you're in school, college, or grad school, you should focus on and finish school first. Maybe a woman will hit on smart guys.

Three very wise words for you.

TRIAL AND ERROR

Ask them, flirt back, grab their ass.

Worst case scenario you will get smacked.

Just be smart about it and then proceed to have fun.

Um, no. That's FAR from the worst-case scenario. They may get a big-muscled friend to pound you, a restraining order on you, and/or even an outright arrest, charge, and conviction.

It's better to learn from other people's mistakes than your own. You only (and fortunately) get to witness the other person's consequence(s). Watch romance movies and any films with romantic elements within. You'll see love mistakes every so often, and what happens when a guy makes such.

Some of you aren't sensitive to broken friendships (and potential friendships) but I am. If I could change my appearance on a whim (a la plastic surgery, but something easier, quicker, and suitable for spur-of-the-moment needs), I could go the trial-and-error route with almost reckless abandon and simply look like someone else when I attempt something different next time.

But back in reality, each girl is so unique, it makes me feel like I lost a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, unlike if she was like an android who was a copy of 2,500 others.

do as i do
observe from the side lines
learn from these interesting creatures Known as humans

Here's something:

Ask them, "Are you hitting on me?"

I never really could get a girlfriend, getting a wife was easier. Some women who are "looking" for a husband will tolerate being "interviewed". My wife passed my interview, showed all the signs of good character and we married eight years ago and are still going strong. It's a very Aspie-like approach, but it worked.

There is seriously no doubt why aspies can't get girls.

Actually--girl speaking from experience here--there is a tactful way of doing this.

I was flirting with an NT guy I'm digging, and, after I'd said something cute, he replied [in a very dorky/sweet way], "Aw, if I didn't know better I'd say you were hitting on me." [Of course I was hitting on him, but that little comment made the banter even cuter.]

It was seriously adorable. But keep in mind...with flirting, practice makes perfect. Even if you have to practice having conversations with imaginary girls with the mirror [which actually works quite well], you'll learn from experience.

My 2 cents worth--

Look, you may never pick up on the signals. I went to a class reunion (never again, by the way), and had a girl tell me about the giant crush she had on me back then. She described the types of flirting she tried and said she went home crying many times because I ignored her.
Ignored her? I would have given anything to have a girlfriend then--I had no idea she even knew I existed.

My point (finally)--why not just ask if they are flirting with you? In retrospective, I wish I had.

Good luck with the love life.

I have this same trouble with guys, and even with just making friends. I can never tell even remotely, because I've learned not to trust what my instinct tells me -- it usually ends up being wrong, and this has sometimes led to embarrassment. With my instinct out of the running, I have absolutely nothing to go on. So I feel your pain.

trust me, ull know. ull see it in her eyes. ull feel it.
(to be on the safe side though, dont make any moves until u REALLY know each other)