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aqueduct58
Butterfly
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Joined: 18 Jul 2008
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 14

07 Aug 2008, 10:05 pm

I wonder if mild sociopathic tendancies , not just lack of empathy, are related to Asperger's.
There's this lady I know, I wouldn't exactly call her a friend, she is more of a family friend, but I enjoy spending time with her and talking to her; I want to be friends with her. She has done a lot for me, but sometimes we had arguments and instead of being mature, I was really nasty to her and said many things that hurt her.
Now she doesn't want anything to do with me and is always polite but cold towards me, and she said it was because of how I had treated her.
But a part of my mind still can't seem to make that connection, I feel like the things I said weren't THAT bad, and that she is being oversensitive and unreasonable. If someone was nasty toward me and then sincerely apologized , I would move on without a problem.
Has anybody else had this type of experience? If so, did you tell the person that your Aspergers could have been causing some of the problems you had with social functioning?



Bunni
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07 Aug 2008, 11:23 pm

I know it's a tough spot you find yourself in.

I've always believed that one should apologize for their wrongs, which you have done.

Unfortunately, the other person doesn't have to accept or forgive. That's the part not within your control.

Perhaps something you said struck something deep in her, that maybe she can't let go of so easily.

The best thing to do is follow up your words with actions. Remain pleasant and patient.

Perhaps she will notice and eventually forgive and/or accept.


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Bunni

That which doesn't kill me, makes me stronger, and really pisses me off.


IdahoRose
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08 Aug 2008, 1:06 am

I know from personal experience that emotional wounds are very difficult to heal. It's very good that you apologized and are sincerely sorry for what you've done, but it may take her a long time to move past it.