I have no friends and don't know how to make any.

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thats bull****, alot of them dont accept me even if i'm ok at basketball and follow the nba. for whatever bull**** reason, they ALWAYS think i'm a poser

Wow, I'm a university student in Toronto too...which one are you going to?!?!

If you're at York, there's an Aspie group that started up last year, it's pretty fun.
If not, maybe you could come over for the sessions

Throw a little girl into the lake?

I think one of the crucial things you have to decide if you want to make friends is to know what it is you want to 'do' with them.

People are essentially reward seeking machines. And people tend to seek relationships based on their assessment of others ability to introduce things such as pleasure, support and reward into their lives. In other words, friends are essentially people who make life more pleasant than it would be without them.

This means that if we want to have friends, we must find ways of making life pleasant for others. There is no shortage of means of accomplishing this... jokes, cooking, dancing, games, a nice place to go.

Being a friend means having the initiative to take a certain amount of responsibility for the health, happiness, pleasure, success, etc, of others.

The means of doing this is down to you but it works best if the way you help others to be feel good about themselves is through things you like doing too.

By initiative and responsibility I mean you have to find ways of making friends with others. When I was in education I started a study group.

At work I have taken it upon myself to invite other workers out for drinks.

As an aspie it is much harder to read social cues of others. Social cues are very often non-verbal signals people send out, through their body language, facial expression, and tone of voice, which signal what they really want. It is very easy to become paralyzed by thoughts of what is appropriate and what isn't. The thing is that people have different ideas about what is appropriate to them and as aspies we find it much harder to navigate the social jungle as these signals are hard for us to read. It's like a language we don't speak or a game we don't have the rules to. I think of it being like an emotional dyslexia.

One thing to do is take time to observe others: How they interact with each other. Go to places where people interact but it isn't seen as strange to Not participate: Coffee shops for example. Simply take some time watching what happy, sociable people do.

If you have a good imagination you can role play in your mind taking part in happy social gatherings... imagine how you would want to act and be seen by others.

One of the basics of social skills is empathy and it's the hardest thing in the world for us... but take it as your life's challenge. Try to understand and accept that even if you won't ever be a TV star, you can improve your skills and success and happiness with effort and positive activity.

Also accept that as an aspie you may simply not enjoy the things others do as much as they do. You may in fact enjoy activities by yourself just as much as they like being sociable. In other words, respect the differences you have from others.

Give yourself a pat on the back for trying: Just by asking questions you're helping yourself, and others too because we All want answers that lead us to better friends. One of the steps to doing so is to think of ways we can become that better friend or partner and one way of doing that is to try to predict what kinds of things others seek in their relationships: Fun, pleasure, excitement, status, for example.

A friendship is a kind of relationship, and almost any relationship I can think of involves helping others to get the things they want - from the tangible things like property to the intangible things like feelings - usually in exchange for something you want.

You don't need friends to survive, but it takes a lot of adaptability and strengthening of the mind and spirit. All who are weak should not apply. You have to be of a particular mindset. Unfortunately, most people are weak and too much social isolation makes them depressed.

It ain't easy. It's hard as hell. And failure is most probable. As is pain and torture.

Wear a real funny t-shirt as an icebreaker

I thought I was the only one who did this. I couldn't take the crap that was being said about me anymore, so I up and left. It was back when the economy was better, so I knew I'm get another job soon enough. But you know, better to quit while you're ahead, then get terminated.

I think he means to create your own friend in a lab. You know that might not be a....nevermind...must not speak my plans outloud

But as far as friends go. Sounds like you have a self-fulfilling prophetsy thing going on. You have a hard time making friends, so you expect a bad outcome. Then you get nervous and say and do things which fulfill that outcome which further concretes your expectations and the cycle continues endlessly unless you do something to break it. The first thing you have to do is not put so much at stake when you meet someone. Dont think about your lonliness and how much you need this person in order to resolve it. Easier said than done and will take practice, but when you are desperate for a friend...people will flee you. It is like an unconscious game of the hunter and the hunted. If you persue them, they will flee. However, what I find what works is get involved in a hobby that is interesting like learning to play a gutar, or an art of some sort and master your skills. Then just perform, or paint or something in a public place like a dorm common room and try to ignore people to some extent when they come around. Be friendly, but distant and people will be interested in you and pursue you instead. Once they start talking to you, keep relaxed, somewhat distant and show them one aspect of who you are at a time...keep the mystery there by always holding something back

I wonder if he ever found any friends?

Bump, bump bump.
On the subject of friends, or anyone in society for that matter, I say this: It's not worth it. Girls only go for idiots or idiots who look good/are failures or sports jocks or as*holes, friends aren't really your friends because it's permissable to claim to be your friend if it appears fashionable...Well, at least in my experience. Welcome to Pennyslvania, home of the biggest as*holes you'll ever meet...

I am a very social person with a large number of acquaintances.

The only way that one makes friends or acquaintances is by getting out and getting involved with things. Join a church, get out a volunteer for an activity that you might enjoy, find a group that partakes in your special interest. I have found that people that volunteer and/or participate on a regular basis in reglious activites have a tendency to be tolerant, kind, understanding, and social. Also if you partake in a group that centers around an interest, it gives you a common subject to talk about.

What I have problems with is trying to build a close friendship with another human being. For some reason my relationships are best conducted on a acquitance level. I am also told, that as an adult it is very difficult to build an intimate friendship with a person, whom is not a spouse.

well i keep blaming myself for not finding any friends but maybe everyone's an idiot except me

blaming others doesnt solve anything blaming yourself is a good place to start fixing it