Can anyone help?

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Hi.

I have had a few questions about interacting with friends and people in general I don't understand.

1) Why do people tell other that are going on a trip to have a safe trip? Isn't that obvious? I can understand with saying, "I hope you have fun on your trip." Do people say have a safe trip because they care about that person??? I do not understand the logic behind this.

2) Should I say when I see a friend that I am glad to see them? Does that help them to feel more welcomed??? I have always thought that saying hello with a smile at them was enough. Is a smile with a hello enough for a friend?

3) I literally can stare at someone when they are talking to me. I am focused on what they are saying. They have my undivided attention. Someone told me that it is rude though. I didn't want to be rude, so I purposely look down and nod while they are talking as if I am thinking and agreeing with what they are saying, but then look back at them. Is this a good idea or can this be taken as rude as well?

4) I was recently told that while someone else is talking to me that I should occasionally say, "yes, uh-huh, ah, ok, oh, etc," during the conversation for it tells the other person that I am listening to them and not ignoring them. Ok, I understand the part that I want someone else to know I paying attention to them, but how does those simple little phrases give them the feeling that I am paying attention to them???

5) (Last one, there are many more, but I didn't want to write a book.) When standing and talking to someone I was told that I shouldn't cross my arms across my chest. That can be seen as a defensive step or arrogant. Well, I can get anxiety while talking to someone and doing that helps me to focus on them. Would it be ok, if I put my hands behind my back and locked my fingers together? Or is putting my hands behind my back seen as some form of rudeness as well???


If anyone can offer some insight or logic to any of these, I would grateful. Thank you.

1. is a figure of speech. like most NT talk it isnt meant to be taken literally.
2. smile and hello is fine
3. look at mouth and alternate your gaze between eyes, mouth and looking away. more than 4 seconds staring at one location is too long.
4. not bad advice just to give acknoledgement to the one who is talking to you that you are recieving what is being said.
if your looking down it can be hard fo rthem to know if you understand.
5. place one wrist into the other hand and place both in front of your crotch. this is a neutral expresion.

A couple of tips I have learned over the years.
Look at the person talking to you, respond accordingly, you may have to pay attention to your facial expressions and tone of voice. Smile when the conversation is pleasant or show concern as needed.
Replies show a few things, that you are listening and that you care about what they are saying. If your grinning while they are talking about a passed away aunt your gonna look like an ass.
People will say "have a nice day" See ya' later" or such as generic greetings. They are pleasantries. Accept them as such. It may help if you talk slower, it gives me time to think so I don't say something that sounds weird to "normal People"
Telling a friend "nice to see you" is a way to show that, well, your glad to see them. People want to be wanted by others. We all do.
Don't focus on logic, saying "god bless you" when someone sneezes is totally illogical, but some people get terribly offended if you don't. Society norms don't always make sense.

Yeah, I do that to. But most people don't mind if you're spaced out as much as if you appear rude. But I like to try and figure out how other people feel by the way they stand, the gestures they make, etc.

Consider all those airline passengers on the planes that flew into the World Trade Center, the Pentagon and the farmland in Pennsylvanlia..."have a safe trip" was pleasantly said by family members as loved ones boarded each plane but tragically, it
did not do any good.