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Sola
Raven
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07 Jan 2009, 10:45 am

Do you struggle with feelings of being misunderstood, especially when people VERBALLY analyze you *about YOU*, whom they actually can't comprehend. How about when they analyze you in front of 'the group'? Does this bother you, does this happen to you. Do you find it difficult when people TELL YOU ABOUT YOU.......pin point you, categorize you, judge you, size you up verbally to your face????? Do people put labels based on THEIR ignorance of YOU *on you* with ease....It seems like they have to FIND THEIR PERSONAL CATEGORY (stereotype) to fit you neatly into. For insance....they try to psychoanalyze you with their limited mindsets.....in my personal experience I find this EXTREMELY unjust.....such as the time a social butterfly called me in front of a bunch of our working aquaintances....PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE. Have you, as an Asperger's individual ever been called passive aggressive by a successful ignorant social-type?



Silver1
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07 Jan 2009, 12:14 pm

Yeah, this happens to me sometimes. It does annoy me a great deal. I'll usually try and just let it go, but other times I'll say or do something about it



pensieve
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07 Jan 2009, 10:26 pm

Someone once said to me 'I don't think you have a hard time making friends - you don't want to make friends', but it could have been one of those NT moments where they say a whole bunch of stuff about you in anger, then later say they did not mean it. I don't even understand why people do that to begin with anyway.
I have had people analyze me at other times, with little stupid comments. My mother does it too - 'you get something in your mind and you think it's the truth'.



protest_the_hero
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08 Jan 2009, 5:39 pm

YES!



ttqs84
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08 Jan 2009, 9:43 pm

well, my mom clearly despises me and enjoys coming to her conclusions about who i am, how i think, and how i handle things. and there were situations where i had this heifer for a teacher in a school in Switzerland who called me a "pest" for no reason. and another where this bitchy mother of my ex-roommate accused me of being "lazy" for not looking for a place to stay after she wanted to kick me out of the apartment (thanks to her stupid & irresponsible daughter). yeah, i get it most of the time.



Crocodile
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09 Jan 2009, 10:52 am

ttqs84 wrote:
well, my mom clearly despises me and enjoys coming to her conclusions about who i am, how i think, and how i handle things. and there were situations where i had this heifer for a teacher in a school in Switzerland who called me a "pest" for no reason. and another where this bitchy mother of my ex-roommate accused me of being "lazy" for not looking for a place to stay after she wanted to kick me out of the apartment (thanks to her stupid & irresponsible daughter). yeah, i get it most of the time.


I can relate. My mother thinks she can analyze like no other, whilst she's actually very bad at it. She thinks she knows all about what I think, what I do and why. She doesn't; she has absolutely no clue.


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oli234
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10 Jan 2009, 12:48 pm

If people analyzing you annoys you go and learn something about psychoanalysis and then you'll probably be able to analyze people back, only with more accuracy and always linking it to hidden psycho-sexual motivations. They wont analyze you again. Just don't do it to people you actually like.



mixtapebooty
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11 Jan 2009, 5:23 pm

You can just be right about everybody. Tell yourself why they really don't want you as a friend. It sucks and it hurts, but I've learned to walk away from people that I thought I could be great friends with, just because I tried to have a good attitude. I made a fool out of myself in front of people who seemed so cool for so long. I finally, finally really understand how and why I do not fit in, and now I don't want to. It's hard to feel like others are stepping ahead of you when they think they know the outcome of your decision before you feel the way they are telling you that you feel. I find it hard to believe that you don't want friends, and someone to suggest that is crossing the line of abuse. I really tried to make them within my peer group(s), now I look elsewhere, but still don't have close ones. I just try to be kind to people in regular places that I go so that I will be a familiar face, but if people are going to be ill witted to me, then I want to have something to say to them.



12 Jan 2009, 1:20 am

Yes, sometimes.



Abstract_Logic
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14 Jan 2009, 12:01 pm

People usually make accurate observations of me; however, they tend to misinterpret the meaning of those observations. For example, they always comment on my quiet, serious nature, and they ask why I don't talk about anything very much. They think it is because I am just shy, emotionally cold, and that I just don't care. Well, that is actually an accurate observation, because I am indeed a little shy, emotionally cold, and a bit apathetic. However, they don't understand the reason WHY I am shy, emotionally cold, and apathetic. The truth is, when people are talking about matters that I'm apathetic to, I tend not to give input or even listen. But they do notice the few times when I have been social--that is to say, awkwardly social--which is the only time my obsessions or interests overlap theirs, therefore I want to give input. On the other hand, I am notorious for making odd comments after a long period of me being silent. I am also notorious for leaving the social scene early. Others really don't see the point of me coming there in the first place (NEITHER DO I), but I just figure I'll go there, spend time with them for a bit to sort of get used to being in a social group, and then go back home to my obsessions.



Homer_Bob
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14 Jan 2009, 2:19 pm

I've definitely been judged mostly through out school. Every time I was in class, I was constantly asked why I didn't speak and was always characterized as anti-social and a loser. I'll never forget the time my 8th grade English teacher called me anti-social because I didn't feel comfortable working with a new student. I went down to the administration and complained about her because I was shocked that a teacher would say that about a student which was very unprofessional. Anyways, anytime someone didn't know me; I would be judged for being different because most people had no idea what was wrong with me. Some people judge me as quiet or shy which I don't think is a bad thing because I am shy. However, there are others who will judge me as anti-social, self centered and mean which I do have a problem with. The fact is most people simply don't know about social disorders which is why they think they can judge. The majority of people are normal so they judge you by comparing you to the general public instead of judging you as an individual. I've told a few close acquaintances that I had aspergers and they've been understanding. One acquaintance of mine who took psychology courses learned about aspergers so she was understanding by my condition and said, "Now I understand why your so quiet". Another person surprisingly said "I never would of guessed you had anything like that." Of course you should only tell those who are worthy about your condition and not some ignorant stranger who judges you. The hundreds of times I was asked why I didn't talk, I never said, "Because I have aspegers." There's a 50 percent chance they don't even know what it is anyways.