In a period of just wanting to be left alone

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I was invited by one of my best friends to go to his house in a couple of Saturdays from now for his b day party. I'd prefer not to go and probably will end up not going. I'll have to lie to him by telling him I was given the morning shift Sunday, and I know he'll be disappointed but oh well....

A girl always says hi to me, she's pretty cute but Ive sorta lost interest in searching for a girlfriend that Ive now given to ignoring her when she says hi to me so eventually she will probably stop. I use to visit another girl in our on campus radio station booth bu I've given up. She walked up to me last Monday and asked me why, I just said I had things to do.

A couple days ago I a guy who was swimming in the lane next to me told me he didn't think I had the technique down right to swim and wouldn't leave me alone until he gave me a few lessons. I was pissed. he ruined my swim.

A lifeguard at the same pool wouldn't let me swim in the deep end but said I was "getting better." Why can't I swim in the deep end, after all they just increased my tuition to pay for the goddamn thing.

Tons of people I use to talk to in high school who attend my university (in the same city) no longer talk to me.

I think I am just going to start telling people to leave me the f**k alone.

What do you think of all this?

Also today at work my friend asked me if i ever had a girlfriend. I said no, and told her I didn't think I ever would. I seemed quite content with saying I never would. She has a boyfriend.

You've hit a question that's been puzzling me for a while. I've always been offended by strangers who share their day with me. And yet, everybody else seems to think that's desirable behavior. So I'm wrong (again)?

But jollifying at random is only recent, historically anyway. I'm a 1950's kid - why, in *my* day ! !!

But I still think it's rude for people to speak without an introduction, or at least some kind of permission - and when I was growing up, everybody thought so! So it's not because of asperger's, is it?

Life would be so much easier if I could assume that nobody would speak to me - I might even resume going out.

I feel the same but then I get too lonely. The only solution I've figured out so far is to limit exposure to them. Just enough so I'm not too lonely. Turns out to be about 90% alone.

Why did the lifeguard not let you swim in the deep end?
You're a capable adult. You should've told him to stick his whistle up his ass.

She's an incompetent lifeguard then. A child could save someone's life better.

My nephew is a lifeguard. When I ran into him at Grandma's over Christmas Dinner, I told him about the lifeguard who ordered me into the shallow end. The kid tried to be loyal to me, but as I provided further details of my exact behaviour in the water, he finally gave up and had to agree with the lifeguard.

It seems that lifeguards are allowed to be upset if I float like a crocodile, by which I mean vertically in the water, sinking slowly till the water covers my mouth and nose, and then 'dog-paddling' my hands just enough to bring my chin clear of the water, then slowly sinking agian ... it's soooo relaxing. But no. It scares the lifeguards. I want to say to them, "Look, if I want to be energetic, I'll go back to the office. I came here to relax." But noooo ...

I've decided to forgive the lifeguards and try to behave myself, since my beloved nephew agrees with them. He would take my side if he could.

Sorry! I got a little lost there.

Why are you withdrawing - hmmm ... could we explore a bit? Are your needs changing? Or maybe you're defining your needs? Are you allowing the "real you" to come through (resulting in withdrawing) or are you running for cover from a mean world?

I don't have answers, but maybe the right question could help? Feel free to ramble, it can clarify things.

Its okay. The lifeguard situation wasn't a big deal, I just felt a little single-out and I also felt like I was in incapable fool. When I enter social situations there are times when something ticks in my head that wants me to withdraw from the situation. I become very irritable and wanting to have nothing to do with people. I figure maybe something chemically is happening in my head when this happens. My best friend invited me to his birthday on the 28th and I don't really want to go as there will be tons of drinking and drunk people and I am really not all that interested in that.

Well, that sounds perfectly normal to me. The people I don't understand are the ones who seek out and attend gatherings like that. But then, I have Asperger's.

Here's an example about refusing from my own life. I was at work, in a department of about 15 people. Judy came in one morning and asked every female in the department to be her bridesmaid. I said no. Maybe I went as far as 'no i can't.' And my life became hell from that moment on.

I hate to suggest this, but could you go and take breaks? I've survived Christmas dinner with family by leaving to tend to my birds (lol, I had 4 birds, but what I really needed was to get out of there). Another thing I use to get away is needing a cigarette break - i don't smoke, but who cares, it gets me out for a quarter of an hour.

What do you think?

my friend is super skinny and i am fat. he gets banged by lots of chicks. he has super awesome life experience. What can be better than getting your brains screwed out by some hot chick?