"communication" problems at work

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Considering that his communication issues are part of his brain structure and therefore something he can't help, that's pretty much the same as threatening to fire a black person unless they can address their "dark skin problems".

Personally, I wouldn't want to associate myself with a company like that. Right now I'd be seeking employment from a company that values my skills over my ability to make small talk.

It's pretty common knowledge that one can't be made responsible for having a specific skin color. (Besides there are ways to change it) It's obviously not his fault, but maybe they just don't know he can't help it. Maybe they think it's because he's shy or not trying hard enough. In that case it may help to just tell them. On the other hand they might think he's only trying to find an excuse for not trying. It's a difficult decision, but if he is going to get fired anyway what else can he do?

What does he do?


Discrimination only applies to factors that are irrelevant to the work. Unfortunately, if they can argue that communication problems prevent him doing his job adequately, then there is probably little that can be done given modern employment law.

Mark, if you're serious about this, I would be there 100% with you on that one!

We'd need a few NT people to do sales and stuff though...

Start it in the Midlands and I'd be in there like a shot!

He is a programmer.

Even if your friend is a programmer, there is often a need to interact with others on a social level. When I worked in I.T. development, I was often part of a development team. In such an environment, it was not possible to isolate oneself and simply concentrate on the coding part of the job. A team environment can resemble the ‘wolf-pack’ environment described by Groovy Druid. I don’t have all the answers to existing within such an environment, but I’ve tried a few things in my time.
My approach was to start with the ‘listening’ part of communication. I rarely initiated conversations with my co-workers. Rather, I let the other person dictate a conversation, and merely made a bland comment at what I thought were appropriate points within the conversation. Eye contact every so often was adequate. I had to fight the urge to dissect the other person’s discourse, and treat the conversation as a debate. My feeling is that NTs do not like their ideas to be challenged, no matter how well constructed you think that your argument is. I think that they are looking for their own mind-sets to be validated. Once you have done that, the NT may think that you are no threat, and mark you somewhere in the social hierarchy that they have in their minds. Being thought of as a ‘Good Listener’ may be good as a first step. Your friend could then initiate some conversations about some current topic, one that requires just a few seconds worth of talk. I hate this meaningless chit-chat, but it was enough to convince co-workers that you think and feel in the same way as them, and are not some brooding loner. Initially, listening to what I thought was irrelevant and mindless chatter was tiring, but gets easier with practice and persistence. I can’t offer any ‘quick fix’ here – sorry.
I’m surprised that the firm at which your friend worked was so concerned with personality, especially if he/she was a contractor. Being a contractor puts your friend in a difficult position, in that they are not part of the hierarchy of the permanent staff. An advantage is that, as long as they are seen to be competent, a contractor can get away with displaying slightly more AS behavioural traits than a permanent employee. However, being seen to be different can cause problems for your friend; they may get unfairly blamed when things for wrong, for example. However, the world of work can be easier to function in, than school/college or social life in general. Everyone is paid to carry out a duty at work and firms are happy so long as business is running smoothly. Faking behaviour is the key.