Aspies can have trust issue's but...

Post Reply New Topic

I have a husband who i think is being sneaky. If it MY personal peroblem with trust PLEASE tell me, but please read below and tell me if this seems sneaky to you.

My husband has:

-created an account with MYSPACE.COM, put in his information and our wedding picture left his married status as SINGLE. I asked him to change it and he said he would next time he goes back to it, but he has not gone back to it.

-at pool halls, he holds me tightly and kisses all over me when other guys are around. But when girls are around backs off from me and acts like i'm not really there. Hardly talks to me, does not put his arm around me.

-has now joined GOOGLE TALK/GMAIL.COM. We alreadly have yahoo IM on our computer. And he already has hotmail, yahoo, his military email, MYSPACE email....accounts.Now another account?

If you guys think i am over jealous here or have trust issue's please tell me, but i don't think things add up. Sure Aspie's do have trust issue's with people. But I feel like he is giving me reasons not to trust him.

I would take this up with him, but when i try he gets defensive with me. This is why i am asking for your help and advise. Why would he tell me he loves me so much, but plays around like this?

Makes me feel that he does not want others with me, but wants to seem available to others.

I don't think there is a problem with joining gmail. Everyone has signed up with gmail just because they offer a better deal than any of the other providers.

As for the myspace thing, the fact that he put up his wedding picture and put single would only make it seem like he's into wife swapping/swinging, and that isn't sneaky because the wife usually knows when she's being swapped. I really doubt he's into that however. It's probably a mistake. I can't tell you how many times I've accidently chosen the wrong age when signing up for things.

I think he deserves your trust.

Me too, if it's just for those reasons.

I have lots of e-mail addresses/aliases now, mostly to avoid spam and people building complete profiles of me by doing a web search or something.

Now for the female and been-there point of view: I think you should trust your gut on this one. I agree you may have some reason for not trusting him. If I had a partner do all those things to me, I'd wonder what was going on. Any the thing on MySpace is kind of weird. Did he say why he was on it all?

Unfortunately, I have many friends who I thought trusted me because my intention was to keep in touch with them. Needless to say, that's exactly why, I can't.

What do trust issues have to do with this? I really don't see the point of establishing forms of contact when the only way to do this in order for it to mean something is to just communicate face to face, at the present time.

Anyway, I hope things work out in the current situation.

I think the key thing here is he HASN'T gone back to MySpace.

Has he ever given you anything that would make you not trust him before all this?

Personally, and its because of some bad realtionships, I would be a tad distrusting anyhow. But unless he has DONE something before all this, I'd just write it off.

I wouldn't trust him as far as I could kick him personally.

I don't know how to deal with it, sorry.

But it depends on what your husband has always been like? has he alwas acted this way, in the pubs?

If any guy acted like that around me in a pub he is not good enough in my opinion.

If your husband puts up his wedding picture on myspace and advertises himself as single, there is definitely a trust issue here. I would confront him about it, and I would also call the TV program "Cheaters" to check up on him or hire a private investigator. If he continues to be defensive, I would have to think about getting the divorce papers ready just in case.

If I did not treat my wife like she was still my wife when other women were around, she would kick my ass out the moment we got home.
Yes, men like to flirt. So do women. It's normal at one level, since people respond to you, and make you feel better about yourself.
Women do flirt with me. I probably do flirt back. But at the same time I will flirt back with my wife.
You have a man with a wandering eye. That is okay. A wandering heart is not. If your personal sex life is deteriorating at the same time, you have serious, possibly fatal, problems in your marriage.