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Astarael
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02 Dec 2005, 7:59 am

I feel like ranting and raving and getting upset and worked up over all my problems. But I don't want to acknowledge them or do anything that would show I have them. Like I just wanna let it all out but I can't. Anyone got any ideas on what I can do? It's making my eyebrows be constantly like this: :x coz I'm trying to think about what my problems are and what I can do. It's driving me insane. :evil: :roll: *sigh*. Sooooo confused.



Namiko
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02 Dec 2005, 9:06 am

When I'm upset about something and cannot express my emotions, I will either cease to function well or write. Things turn out better when I write because then I can get out all of my frustration onto paper and think things through. When I am really ticked off and I write fictional stuff, I usually end up almost killing one of my imaginary characters. :roll:

But first, take a deep breath. And don't forget to exhale. ;)


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hecate
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02 Dec 2005, 9:27 am

i don't know if this will help (i apologise if this sounds like i am trivialising your problems) but, when i feel lots of unpleasant emotions building up inside me, i watch a comedy show and try to laugh as loud as i can at every joke. for me, this really releases a lot of tension.



danlo
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02 Dec 2005, 10:58 am

I know exactly what you mean, Astrarael. Actually, I just posted about the same thing in another thread. It's almost unbearable, the headsplitting frustration. You can't just type it all out and then quickly hit the submit button, either. I try to approach it indirectly. Trick myself into thinking I'm not actually talking about myself, just talking about something else entirely. I tried that today in that other post. I almost got away with it, but then it broke and took control. I became too aware of what I was doing. I had to rewrite it a half dozen times until it was sufficiently vague and impersonal enough that it slipped under. You can only hope then that someone can read into your writing. I try to get to that point with my mother, so she can ask questions and figure out what's wrong without me actually telling her. I also find that alcohol helps. God, does it help. Other than that, I can only say I hope it helps.



danlo
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02 Dec 2005, 11:31 am

Also might I add, that if you do what I do, try to post indirectly about your problems and hope someone will pick up on it, don't bother trying on an Aspergers website. I've found that they never pick up on it. Just gets you more frustrated that they can't see it, or maybe even won't see it. It's all very convoluted, bloody thing.
Also, Namiko, that's not quite what Astarael is talking about. She's talking about, like, she knows what the problem is, she can write it down and if you could see it you'd understand. It's just she can't force herself to put it somewhere where someone can see it and understand, y'know? It's all very hard to understand if you don't have the problem.
I notice in another related thread, you (Astarael) have mentioned it's something to do with caring what others think about you. I have also thought it is along similar lines, but less to do with caring what others think about you, but more about not putting yourself into a possible situation of vulnerability. It's always reminded me of the lyrics of a song, and it's why I love it. It sums up what the problem is quite nicely. One of Ben Lee's songs, called Shirtless. You might like it, so I'll quote the lyrics:

Quote:
It's not just my body, it's where I keep my heart
And that's mostly its difference, from any other part
And you wonder why I hide it like I do, and you wonder why I treat it like I do.
I'm just so scared you'll see the true me, or worse maybe right through me
If I would walk around without a shirt.
If I go half naked, you'll see my heart is vacant
You'll take my heart if I take off my shirt.

http://www.ben-lee.com/full_page.php?d= ... rtless.htm

FYI, yeah, I always swim with my shirt on.



Astarael
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03 Dec 2005, 7:51 am

*starts singing gamble everything for love* - danlo reminded me of that song with the one you posted lyrics to.
I should pay alot more attention to my breathing hey, alot of the time I hold my breath without realising it. And I've never tried comedy. It has to be funny to get me to laugh so if it's not funny I just stare at it and go "okay...". I'll look into it.
See alot of the time I could just try and get it all out hastily and hope they don't ask too many questions, but then you have to worry about who you tell and if you post it at a forum like this or you email someone closer to you and most of the time I find I have no one who I could talk to. So then I add the fact that I need someone to talk to to my worries and my eyebrows die again. Does alcohol help your ability to talk about it or the feeling? Alcohol makes me really really depressed, I don't know anyone else who does what I do but I start crying incontrollably and then I'm all happy again. Like when people expel er stuff in not so nice ways and their stomach feels better they go and start drinking again. That's the effect crying has on me. So I don't think alcohols for me.
That song is good at summing up that. This whole talking about problems is too hard! I'm starting to not make sense now...



danlo
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04 Dec 2005, 5:02 am

Actually, its exactly because alcohol is depressing that it helps. When I'm out and severely drunk, and I start coming down, I sit down and go quiet. Then my brothers try and get me going again, so I start telling them all sorts of problems. On the other hand, if they've done something to set me over the edge while I'm drunk, I'll either go psychotic or start walking, then hop on the phone and cry to my mum, and talk to her about it. I guess it all depends on what sort of relationship you have with your family. Or, failing that, with your friends.
Astarael, you are still making sense. Alcohol isn't a solution; you can't go getting drunk every time you need to talk about problems. And people think you're just talking s**t cause you're drunk anyway. Here's another method I sometimes use. Sometimes I will write stuff on my computer, say in a post to WP, then leave it there, unposted but onscreen. Then I'll go away to do something I have to do, or really like doing, and forget about it, and just hope that my dad or someone else I trust will jump on the computer and read it. No compulsions to remove it, or reword it to become less personal, because after all, you don't intend to post it. Learning to lie to yourself is the easiest way, because you don't have to go through the side-effects of being drunk. But getting myself drunk is the most reliable way.



NathanHarding
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19 Feb 2006, 12:27 pm

Astarael wrote:
I feel like ranting and raving and getting upset and worked up over all my problems. But I don't want to acknowledge them or do anything that would show I have them. Like I just wanna let it all out but I can't. Anyone got any ideas on what I can do? It's making my eyebrows be constantly like this: :x coz I'm trying to think about what my problems are and what I can do. It's driving me insane. :evil: :roll: *sigh*. Sooooo confused.


sometimes what i would do when im angry or upset, since im gr8 at it, is draw, draw, draw



SuchBrokenDolls
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19 Feb 2006, 1:34 pm

NathanHarding wrote:
Astarael wrote:
I feel like ranting and raving and getting upset and worked up over all my problems. But I don't want to acknowledge them or do anything that would show I have them. Like I just wanna let it all out but I can't. Anyone got any ideas on what I can do? It's making my eyebrows be constantly like this: :x coz I'm trying to think about what my problems are and what I can do. It's driving me insane. :evil: :roll: *sigh*. Sooooo confused.


sometimes what i would do when im angry or upset, since im gr8 at it, is draw, draw, draw


I draw like crazy too, it's a good way to release emotions, whether or not you're good. I usually just fall asleep too, I get myself so worked up I just crash.... :D *sigh*