coping with death

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First off, I want to apologize for not posting in a long time. I have been busy with other reposnsibilities (work, etc.)

My mom went to visit my grandmother in a hospital in Massachusetts today (in fact she passed me on my way to work, but I digress.) I asked her how she was and the reply came "so-so." I feel that she (my grandmother) isn't long for the world, even though I have said to myself when she had a stretch of less serious illness (i.e., just feeling tired early during our visits) recently that I wouldn't be surprised if she died the next day. Well, c'est la vie...

Having said that, I was wondering if there is/are any advice/resources (internet or otherwise) I could obtain. All I have found so far is a service provided by my employer to help balance work and life outside of it, which has some tips on coping with "loss and grief", as it puts it on its website.

BTW, you'll be glad to know that it also has resources on AS and autism - if you have children with autism/AS, that is.

I'm saddened to hear that your Grandmother is not doing so well.

You might try the samaritans.
http://www.samaritans.org/talk/questions.shtm#

Its not a religous group, disprite the name. They are somehow assocated with Befreinders. I've talked to a befreinder before and it was helpful.

Good luck to you and your family.

BeeBee

Hi!

I can cope with death, but only if it was not of someone who I admired very well, like a relative or a famous person.

I hope you do better in the near future!

I agree with BeeBee that The Samaritans are an excellent resource. I can't say enough good about them.

Other suggestions:

1) Read Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's books, esp. On Grief and Grieving. Dr. Kubler-Ross is best known for her groundbreaking book *On Death and Dying.* Dr. Kubler-Ross died in 2004 of natural causes. Her last work before retirement was with babies born with AIDS. More info on the
Web: http://www.elisabethkublerross.com/

2) If there is a hospice in your area, think about visiting it. Talk to the people there--doctors, nurses and patients. Explain your situation and ask them what are the best ways to cope. You might also consider volunteering there.

3) Give yourself time to mourn. It can't be rushed. I speak as someone who has lost both parents and several good friends in the past decade. Do what you need to do: cry, scream, write in a journal, paint a picture. If there are people in your life who won't give you the time and space to grieve (most people will), consider Xing them out of your life.

4) Celebrate your grandmother's life. Maximize the time you have left with her. Read to her. Tell her you love her. Tell her all the things you haven't told her yet. And, most important, just be with her.

5) Use this resource. We're always listening, 24/7/365.

May God be between you and harm in the dark places you must walk.[/i][/u]

When last I heard, my grandma was doing OK, so there's some good news for ya.

when people die it can be hard.

although i am lucky in that i havent had any close to me die i often think about what would happen if they did. somtime because of this i know i find my self distincing myself from older people.

i hope this helps in some weird way, although it is VERY good news that she is doing better

God Bless.

Jamie