How Others Perceive Starting Romantic Relationships

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Tonight, Friday night, as I was drawing, a couple of guys in my dorm lounge were talking about women, which is a topic of particular interest to me, so my ears perked up. I overheard them talking about how they'd dislike kissing a girl who smokes and that they thought there were a lot of single women on campus here. One of them claimed that a big part of getting into a relationship is just having the courage to go up to a woman and say hi. The guy who said that is already in a relationship.

This is NT guys' perception of the situation. My experience has stood in stark contrast to their perception, however. I have been making many attempts to meet a woman simply for friendship, and I can say with confidence that it's not as simple as saying hi. I have by and large gotten over my shyness regarding women, and I'm trying to be friendly: I smile, I tell jokes, and I laugh. Many of the women I've talked to already have boyfriends or just plain not interested. You might think I'm being too selective and trying to find some ideal woman who's gorgeous, smart, kind, etc. This isn't the case at all.

Basically, right now my only selective criterion is whether they'll go out with me. I've talked to girls of all kinds: smart, dumb, beautiful, so-so looking, thin, skinny, a little overweight, geeky, outgoing, optimistic and open minded, pessimistic and skeptical, depressed, sick, healthy, artistic, athletic, kind, snobby and pretentious, etc. No luck. I may have Asperger's syndrome, but I wouldn't think it would have such a huge effect on my ability to attract women. I am looking after myself physically, too, so I'm not some stereotypical geeky-looking slob.

I've got to say women are a mysterious to me.

I can see your situation. I am a unuseral
person and they can tell by first meeting me.
I can either attract(with some hits and misses)
and scare away(just being me). The last
relationship was 10 years, almost the closest
thing to a marriage that I ever thought I
would get(it outlived most marriages by NT's),
.....BUT.....
was built on accepting our uniquenesses.
Too bad that 5 years later I can say now say
that I am ready for a relationship, but HOW
DO YOU ASK IF YOUR A UNIQUE(or bluntly
put-weird) person like myself. I would like to
give you a answer, and the best I can do is
sympathize.




There lies the problem that I see. I, for
example, and perhaps you don't fit this
expectant requirement that they believe
they must accept. It seems if they are
overweight, they want the perfect Romeo.
If they are skinny, they tend to fall for
the medium build person. Its seems
that it is the opposite that is desired
though unrealistic. I, and alot of the
AS/HFA folk even try to chat it up with
females here on WrongPlanet, BUT
if it is a relationship what are their
expectations? Hmmmm? It would
be nice to have a relationship again




Same here, Hmmm? any takers?

most UNLOVED and seeking-"NeatHumain" and your
author of this pen! Ghosthunter