Having a bad time.

Post Reply New Topic

There is a real family problem going on at the moment and it seems to be getting out of control and I dont know what to do.

I live with my dad, my step mum and my step brother and my blood brother and sister live with my mum. My mum doesn't seem to know how to be a mother and social services have picked up on this, she doesn't look after my brother and sister properly (who are 13 year old twins), like the place is a mess, she doesn't get them to go to school and other things that a mother should do, my brother and sister cook their own meals and sometimes even for my mum.

I feel so bad and I do go down there and help out but I still feel guilty and feel as though I should be doing more but I dont know what.

My dad thinks that social services might try to take my brother and sister away but my dad said he would never let that happen and they would have to come and live with us. I dont mind that happening as I want what's best for them but there are gonna be 6 people living in a three bedroom place. I guess it's not all that bad, atleast my brother and sister will be better off.

I just wish that what my mum would realize whats she's doing but I know she wont. The amount of times that me and my dad have gone down to my mums and tried to sort things out but it always goes back to the way it was in the first place.

I just dont know what to do, I lived with my mum for a while and I know what she is like, when my brother and sister were young I was the one practically looking after them, making sure they had clean clothes, making sure they got off to school. I think maybe now I shouldn't have left and things would be better, even if I had to look after them atleast I know social servies probably wouldn't have got involved and there wouldn't have been a chance that they will get taken away.

Sorry for this long post but I really needed to get this off my chest.

Hmm does your mom use ilegal drugs? She sounds like a person with extreme
ADHD like myself. Maybe stimulants could help her (unless she is allready abusing them). My guess your mom is very aware of what she is doing wrong, but powerless
to control her mind. Strong thetawave in a certain part of your brain tell you "hey
dude just set hear and day dream with me". Will power alone want stop it no more than will power can make you cure any medical condition.

I feel for you because I know you got about 1% chance of her listening to my suggestions(even if they apply). My parents would not.

Thanks for the reply. No she doesn't use drugs. I dont know whats wrong with her, if it's depression, or what. Whatever it is she wont accept it, or help. When she went to the doctors a long while ago she was told something by the counselor, not sure what, but my mum just said she was wrong and there was nothing wrong with her mentally.

But at the same time I think she is a hypercondriac, she will read a medical dictionary and try to find things wrong with her, I think she does it to gain sympathy or attention I just dont know.

Thanks for the advice and info, like you said though even if I tried she probably wouldn't listen.

Try not to get too worried.

There are some people who are beyond help and I'm afraid this may be one of those cases. By supporting her you might even be helping her to carry on without changing.

Rescue the kids and then see what happens.

Thanks, yeah I think whatever I do it's not going to make a difference. My priority is my brother and sister, the whole thing just gets me down you know. I'm just going to try not to think and worry about it like you said.