Not sure I can go on

Post Reply New Topic

This is hard to do, but I have no one else to tell. I don't feel that life is worth living anymore. I'm tired of struggling. There is a Crisis hot-line in my city which is manned by inexperienced, very young people who volunteer, and they constantly put you on hold if you call up and say you are suicidal. I have family that don't give a crap about me, a grown daughter who calls me and dumps her problems on me but won't take advice, and life just drags me down a little more each day. I am finding it harder and harder to go on. The few people I have tried to have for friends dump me, telling me I'm weird, or they just wanted sex all along. I can usually get through these periods by staying busy or calling someone, but each time, I'm harder hit and I'm finding it harder to find reasons to hang around. There is really no reason to that I can see. I can see a life winding down to increased solitude with nothing to look forward to except medical appointments. I have no friends, and I can't think of one person who would really give a s**t if I die, except my daughter, and maybe my cat would miss me.

Listen to me: CALL 911 RIGHT NOW!! ! GET HELP

I will NOT call 911. Cops are as*holes and do not care if I live or die. And they will humiliate me-believe me, I've been there. I don't know why I posted on here, but maybe some small part of me hopes for inspiration to go on. But I can tell you for sure that society has no sympathy for people who are discouraged. They treat you like a mental patient when you are merely overwhelmed and discourage. And they will kick you when your are down.

Call your daughter. Call the Fire dept. Just get help!

At least I tried. I thought I could get some support here, but I guess it's too late at night. I sort of started of list of things I'd like to get out of the way, in case I decide to do this. I am really hurting and I don't know what else to do. I wish I could just wake up and be somebody else, who doesn't have AS and all of my physical problems. I know that nobody has it easy, but I don't want easy. I just want fair.

If you have the same morbid sense of humour as your signature suggests, I would NOT top yourself. You are too intelligent to commit suicide. In my opinion, only the stupid and the insane kill themselves. From what I can gather, you are neither.

Call someone for help. "Shop around", so to speak, for a decent counselling service.

Hey, if you want to talk, PM me. I've been there for weeks. Things may be taking a turn for the better, for me, and I didn't see much of a way out, either. If I don't answer right away, it's 11:15 Pacific Time, USA, and I won't be up much longer. I know your child and cat would miss you, my cat would me, and that's the small thing that kept me going. Just talk to me.

Good on you, Yowling Cat, for offering ~actual~ support.....as opposed to merely bleating "No! don't do it!! OMG please ring someone!! Oh! Oh! Oh!".

I can't say that I know exactly what kind of advice you'll give, so I'll withhold my judgement there, but at least you were big enough to actually offer. People who bleat on with pro-life crap aren't helping, they're just ~panicking~ because they're frightened by the concept of suicide. Suicidal people aren't usually afraid of suicide, so this ain't gonna wash with them. What they're trying to do is find a solution to their problem/s; their solution just happens to be rather extreme and possibly ill-advised.


Hartzofspace: I hope you find someone to talk with who will understand you. Unfortunately, I am in too similar a situation to offer any assistance to you, but I wish you well.


Brendan

I can understand where you are coming from as I have been struggling with the same thoughts of no-one in the world knowing or caring if I am not here...in spite of having parents and 1 brother. It can feel like that when you just cannot find anyone to reach out to...especially as you tend to learn through bitter experience that most just will not tolerate someone who is in such a state of mind. But I will say, your daughter would care, I can assure you, even though at times you might not feel that. I am always around if you need to talk, whether by pm or email or other means and I suppose I can say with pretty strong conviction that although I am not you, I can relate to what you are feeling totally, having been through it many, many times. But I will not try and say 'Don't do it', etc etc, as in the end, it is your choice and you have free will and because I know that if life ever becomes too painful for me, I would not listen to anyone asking me to not do it.

Thank you, all, for your thoughtful responses. They really helped me.

one book I'd recommend is "The art of happiness". It based on a whole bunch of discussions between a psychiatrist and the dalai lama. It's not a religious book. It's not even a really long book. He makes a lot of good points on how to be happy.

I could never explain as well as he does.

lmao, if you can be active on online your forums you're ok

I hope things improve with you soon!