Forced to relocate, commute hr+, or $3000 becomes $1000

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georgewilson
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Age: 35
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Location: Dubuque, IA

23 Jun 2023, 6:11 am

I'm about to lose my 10-year job unless I commute an hour and a half away because the in-town site closed 4 months ago and the remote work has been shuttered with two weeks' notice. My mother is on Social Security and I live with her so that's the rent and utilities, and she might qualify for a couple hundred a year food assistance, and I'm applying more locally and for other remote, but meanwhile car expenses (fortunately an old used we own and not a lease to the repo) and a storage unit I've been begging her to cooperate on clearing loom along with the Hulu she gets live TV on loom. She can't seem to get even little part-time gigs despite a P.Hd. as employers keep turning her down and tricking her, and I've had some disappointments in job searching with no offers in a year or so of pretty serious searching.

Right now, I'm a little scared, and though the major change to my job likely qualifies me for unemployment insurance, it's just 4 months in-state and I have to accept offers for work if I get them paying less and less as it moves along. This is the only job I've had for longer than a month and I struggle to coordinate with my arms (dyspraxia) for food service or industry, while I struggle with the interview process for other things and the people skills of retail; I have a B.A. but gig work has been the name of the game, may get more simply to keep the lights on. My mom has clinical depression, usually well-controlled on SSRIs (I'm back on them for anxiety and boy do I need them now) but they do get her mood swinging a bit so I take what she says with a grain of salt that it could change; she's saying we have to commute and willing to help drive me over and back every day until we get used to the route since she's more of a morning person, but it's very disruptive and will prevent us from the gas alone from saving anything so we're right back where we started. I just feel so upset by how they're going about this, and have little support at home and therapy 5 days from now, with us awaiting answers from state unemployment authorities as to how to proceed.

Any insight into how to handle this kind of ultimatum other than just grinning and bearing it for God knows how long? Summer we can maybe do but I suspect winter would break me in this Midwestern state on these rural highways.



goldfish21
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27 Jun 2023, 7:49 pm

It’s only an hour or so commute each direction?

That’s a normal daily work commute. Often people are on the road for longer now that people have to live far from work in order to be able to afford housing.

1h drive each way = no big deal, IMO.


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georgewilson
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Joined: 19 Aug 2007
Age: 35
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Location: Dubuque, IA

30 Jun 2023, 1:22 pm

Update: No non-compete and they will pay unemployment given the hour and a half commute, two weeks' notice from them was the issue in part goldfish. My mom and I have grieved and accepted, and there are some great references ready to back me up.

Now I just need to figure out what to do with the rest of my life. MPromising part-time library job makes about as much for 30 hours I guess as I did in 20, maybe it'll do if I get the offer. Bumping for more advice.