The worst thing a bully has done to you

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Support groups where the nerds/outsiders male and female meet together at school/college and have strength in numbers. They can warn each other where the bullies are and where to avoid being targeted. Avoid gym class because no one wants to be picked last for the team. Hide out at their library because the bullies rarely go to libraries.

My trauma tends to manifest in the strangest way ever: I don't even worry about being bullied again, but I do feel a vague sense of being afraid of feeling uncomfortable.

I hate bullying. One time my BFF (a boy) got beat up by the school bully's (Jacob, gouge, and omle), the staps of his underwear pulled up over his shoulders, and stuffed into mia's (my other BFF) locker. I went too get her of course, and he was rescued half an hour later.

each of those bullies needs his nether regions sanded up good and plenty with 40 grit paper, then shoved into a locker.

One day when I was in Grade 6, I was feeling suicidal and I told some girls in my class that I wanted to kill myself. My bully who's been after me for 4 years already told me that all I have to do is stick a kitchen knife through my chest and I can be done with it. The girls told him to smarten up.

Big muscly abusive older brother punching me and threatening me with wooden baseball bat and knifes, and locking the house when I tried to escape, when I was severely autistic when I was younger.

A teenage hippy made me eat cannabis cake when I was a child.

Guess I'm just an easy target for bullies.

I recall being in gym, sitting in those tiered seats and becoming aware of someone poking me on the shoulder. I turned around and there was a kid there I didn't know - I was quite new to the school - and he just pretended nothing was happening. But he kept poking when I turned away again and then I turned around and said something like "What? What do you want?" and he just started punching my face. Completely random. Not sure how many times but it was 5 or 6 punches straight to my face. No idea why.

Anyway the longer I was at that school the more I found out he was just a complete psycho. He attacked teachers and took a cricket bat to the head of one of the 6th formers (this was in his first year of secondary school) and I saw the mess that guy's face was afterwards and frankly felt myself lucky. I wouldn't be at all surprised if that kid is in jail now.

Wow where do I start? Some I honestly don't even like discussing. I'm pressed for time now but I will delve in deeper later. For now, lets just say 7th grade still messes with my head 30 years later.

From a different thread:

I hate uncensoring talking about this because it makes me want to throw up. I should have gotten a job at 19 but noooooo, I had to be "lower functioning". Worst of all, they are very ableist to me and a specific student there is VERY abusive to me, yet they are obsessed with Looney Tunes and stop watching it and made me hate Hatsune Miku. Like they call the horrible things I am not (I am manipulated into saying things I don't mean and often have intrusive thoughts) and choked me once and didn't get punished for it. They won't expell them either and it pisses me off so bad. There's also the Nintendo fanboys who tell me shows from my childhood that have adult fandoms (G4 MLP, Care Bears) and Looney Tunes are for babies. The staff are also abusive to me, they yell at me (which I can't handle) and grab me (I HATE BEING TOUCHED). I want to get out but my family won't let me and force me to stay there for the rest of my life. I especially hate how my bully/abuser will be moving back to my class soon as they are turning 18. I am also being forced to stay over for summer, and I don't want to deal with this s**t all summer, I want to have fun! This school makes me more depressed than I already am. I wish I was normal so I can be in a normal school and get a job when I am supposed to!

Well... One time there was this group of guys that liked to pick on me a lot, particularly in one class. The other girls wouldn't stand up for me because for some reason they hated me. Anyway, on one occasion it crossed over into SA, if you know what I mean.

I do want to say that I blocked out this memory and only recently have had evidence of the incident resurface - like an old diary where I mentioned it and remembering one of the guys' faces for the first time in a long time - which triggered intensely uncomfortable feelings. Honestly, I was initially willing to write off the diary entry as me exaggerating (I was a teenager) but when I a little bit later recalled that one guy's name and face and had that feeling I have since then had to take it seriously.

Oh well, I'm fine. =) Well, I think... I mean one thing I've learned a lot over the past several years has been how essential it is to work out traumas. However, given how little of this I remember, I just think it may be a can of worms best left unopened for the most part.

One time a guy was standing at the bottom of the stairway, in school, and slugged me so hard I was unconscious, because I had given him some back talk earlier. He didn't get into trouble for this.

Worst? I'm not sure... Thrown my bag on a garbage tin that was too small to fit my bag full of books?

I proceeded with find that person.
Then he goes running. Like most bullies do.
And everyone knew who's at fault.


They really like to make a thrill out of running from someone who will beat them up.

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There were SO many instances of bullying all through my school career, most all of which I remember (sadly) because they affected me so much. But of all the instances I remember, I would have to say that the boys hiding my clothes after gym class (when I was TOTALLY NAKED) was the worst. I don't recall how it turned out; I think I just looked around the locker room until I found them. Which was embarrassing as all hell because any of the boys that wandered in would have seen some geek just wandering around naked. I think i remember exactly that happening and the boys laughing at me like i was an idiot. I do remember that I told the school guidance counselor about it, and my mom told me later that she (the counselor ) was PISSED about it! She couldn't believe it.

How do you recover from that? seriously! how do you forgive those people and let it go and move on in life and stop it from affecting you? i feel like a total wuss that I'm 50 now, and all that stuff happened over 30 years ago, and it's still affecting my self esteem. No matter HOW i've tried, I've never been able to shake the feeling that I brought that stuff on myself, and that there must have been some truth in the things they said about me. Everytime someone teases me, even in a loving or joking manner, it triggers all that stuff and needless to say, it's NOT pleasurable.

i started reading these responses. BIG mistake! now i feel absolutely horrible, and it makes me furious. furious at people for how vicious, heartless, and downright sociopathic they can be. The best I can say is that I hope all of you have somehow been able to heal, or someday WILL heal, and find your best life, and don't let the memory of those as*holes all those years ago hurt you any longer. I pray you can have a great life to where you can say to them (in your mind) "see? i did it! i made something of myself! which is more than I'm sure you ever did."

<3

I tell myself that in my life review I won't have to deal with the bullies' bad behaviors from their point of view, they will know they phuqed up big time and will be held to karmic account. the bullies' taught me one key lesson, which is to never NEVER copy their behavior towards others.