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Nobody wants to be with a freak

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Pink Zeppelin
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23 Apr 2025, 3:11 pm

Nightwing82 wrote:
Pink Zeppelin wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
So why the f**k shouldn't I kill myself?! My life is already over in any way that matters anyway.


Viktor Frankl used to ask his depressed patients that very question. HE thought that the answer they gave would uncover what is meaningful to them in life. What answer do you come up with?



Escape1894
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24 Apr 2025, 12:54 am

Nightwing82 wrote:
Pink Zeppelin wrote:
Nightwing82 wrote:
And why should I have to be lonely forever just because the universe arbitrarily chose me and not Steve down the street to inflict with a developmental disorder I never asked for?


I am sorry you are in the situation that you are in, it sucks. Some of us just get dealt a bad hand genetically. We didn't ask for it, and most of us don't like it. I know that there are those on this board that seem to be ok being autistic. They say that it makes them who they am. I am not one of them-I f**king hate being autistic, and I am probably have a less severe level than many on here do.

This is the issue that Heidegger called "thrownness". We are thrown into existence at a place and time not of our choosing, with issues and conditions that we didn't choose. We had no say in any of this, it just happened, by chance if you are nihilistic, or by some divine plan if you aren't.

To be honest, I have not read enough Heidegger to know what is the answer to deal with thrownness. Probably something I need to look into in that I have some existential issues myself related to it.

The best I have come to do so far is to realize that life isn't fair and some people get dealt a bad hand genetically. That realization at least made me realize that there wasn't much I could have done to improved by past (or present) and to stop expecting to be like NTs. Although if you catch me on a bad day I still fall into depression over that


I like being who am, and I can't imagine who I would be without autism. But the problem is that none of that is worth the price I have to pay in being eternally alone and unlovable.

And why the fucj should I have to just accept that I can never have a life as good as an NT?! Why do I have to accept that I'm lesser just because I was born different? Why should any of this make me feel any better?


Because that’s just how life can go. Life isn’t fair. It wasn’t before we were born. It’s not when we are alive and it still won’t be when we are dead. Although I’m 10 years younger than you, I’ve never had a woman ever be interested in me, no dates, relationships, sec, etc. Women either find repulsive or invisible. I too also feel like I’m a monster of sorts. However even with all of that, you certainly don’t have to accept that you are lesser than because you were born with autism. Also don’t you want to experience being in a relationship? Yeah being 40 with no experience will be a turn off for a lot of women, but if this is something you truly want to experience, keep living and keep putting in the work.



The_Face_of_Boo
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24 Apr 2025, 9:42 am

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BTDT
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24 Apr 2025, 1:45 pm

Go through the difficult process of getting your teaching credentials. Ask for help if necessary.

Getting that will allow you to earn the confidence you need to be more attractive to women.



Nightwing82
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26 Apr 2025, 3:25 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
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Not my experience...

BTDT wrote:
Go through the difficult process of getting your teaching credentials. Ask for help if necessary.

Getting that will allow you to earn the confidence you need to be more attractive to women.


It's too late. I'm too old for any of that to matter at this point.

Escape1894 wrote:

Because that’s just how life can go. Life isn’t fair. It wasn’t before we were born. It’s not when we are alive and it still won’t be when we are dead. Although I’m 10 years younger than you, I’ve never had a woman ever be interested in me, no dates, relationships, sec, etc. Women either find repulsive or invisible. I too also feel like I’m a monster of sorts. However even with all of that, you certainly don’t have to accept that you are lesser than because you were born with autism. Also don’t you want to experience being in a relationship? Yeah being 40 with no experience will be a turn off for a lot of women, but if this is something you truly want to experience, keep living and keep putting in the work.


So if life isn't fair, why should I want to continue living? Why shouldn't I opt for the alternative?

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