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JibetyFibets
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Joined: 8 May 2025
Gender: Male
Posts: 2

08 May 2025, 5:11 am

This is my reality as an autistic adult. I was hospitalized for over eleven hundreds days as a child in childrens mental hospitals. My disabling behaviors since I was pre-k, through elementary and middle school, and through hospitalizations from age 13 through 17, include things I do to this day, which I did in my childhood, including going some route, and then going back the way I came, through the same door(s), the same way. Do you know that most people do not do that, nor do they care about doing that? Also walking the outer and inner perimeter of places I go, for keeping separate from others in a concrete way. You see, I see my paths as an extention of me, and everyone elses paths as extentions of them, and I want my path separate from everyone elses paths. No acting here. No acting normal here. No inauthentic normal acted mask here. No sir. I walk backwards, or reverse my pivoting clockwise or counterclockwise at minimum, to reverse my paths. I reverse paths. I avoid people crossing my path(s). Any crossing of my path, hemming me in, or irreversible crossing of my path is a trespass to me, a violstion of my sense of self and a threat or assault on my boundaries of separation from others. And I have not yet mentioned my freezes for noise trespasses, except that I just did, mention it. But I did not explain it. JibetyFibets(a.k.a. FibetyJibets on quora), May 7, 2025



ASPartOfMe
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Joined: 25 Aug 2013
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 37,864
Location: Long Island, New York

08 May 2025, 7:21 am

JibetyFibets wrote:
This is my reality as an autistic adult. I was hospitalized for over eleven hundreds days as a child in childrens mental hospitals. My disabling behaviors since I was pre-k, through elementary and middle school, and through hospitalizations from age 13 through 17, include things I do to this day, which I did in my childhood, including going some route, and then going back the way I came, through the same door(s), the same way. Do you know that most people do not do that, nor do they care about doing that? Also walking the outer and inner perimeter of places I go, for keeping separate from others in a concrete way. You see, I see my paths as an extention of me, and everyone elses paths as extentions of them, and I want my path separate from everyone elses paths. No acting here. No acting normal here. No inauthentic normal acted mask here. No sir. I walk backwards, or reverse my pivoting clockwise or counterclockwise at minimum, to reverse my paths. I reverse paths. I avoid people crossing my path(s). Any crossing of my path, hemming me in, or irreversible crossing of my path is a trespass to me, a violstion of my sense of self and a threat or assault on my boundaries of separation from others. And I have not yet mentioned my freezes for noise trespasses, except that I just did, mention it. But I did not explain it. JibetyFibets(a.k.a. FibetyJibets on quora), May 7, 2025

Welcome to Wrong Planet.


_________________
Professionally Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity.

“My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person”. - Sara Luterman


blitzkrieg
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Joined: 8 Jun 2011
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 20,176

08 May 2025, 10:03 am

Quote:
We are told to hide our behaviors and try to watch those others around us because our behaviors are “weird,” “difficult,” or “wrong.” My mother used to ask me, “What is wrong with you?” all the time. Friends and peers reinforce these messages. Many of us have faced lifetimes of rejection that remind us that we aren't acceptable as who we are.


I found this passage of the text to be most relatable. :(

NTs in particular are judgmental about any autistic traits that one might have, in my experience.