Should I convert back to Islam?

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They're all getting deported now.

keep up with fashion/music/physical/cultural activities (I did fail in that area as I was too logical/academic),

I believe that you have get lucky in your early 20s or you're out of luck. Most women are not psychotic or have unreasonable expectations. The problem for those of us who did not get luck early on is that these women have no reason to still be single in their 30s or 40s. I know that many are divorced, but it has been at least a decade since I can remember meeting a divorced woman who is not already remarried or seeing someone. Besides, most divorced people prefer other divorced people. Being over 40 and never married is often seen as a red flag.

I did not deconstruct my religious indoctrination until my late 20s, and by that point the damage was already done. I returned to the US and started college when I was 20 and I still was very much a Muslim. Islam is very strict about relationships with women being limited to marriage only. I still had the mindset that I need to find a someone to marry, which probably scared many women away. Though the vast majority already had boyfriends anyways. If I was open to casual dating or hookups things might have gone differently, but by the time I was it was too late.

Additionally, Libyan culture is extremely segregated by gender; boy and girls go to different schools, and social gathering are segregated with men and women going to separate rooms. When I started college, socializing with women and having female friends was a new experience to me; I had no clue how to talk to woman.

For the first 3 years or so, I could not get a girlfriend. Then I met me ex, who was extremely manipulative and emotionally abusive. She socially isolated me and frequently gaslighted me. She groomed me to the point that I was scared to go anywhere or buy anything without her approval. She threatened to leave me any time I did not do whatever she wants. By the time we broke up, I was completely torn down and felt like a shell of myself. And I have dated anyone else since then. The vas majority of women I met after that were not single, and the few rare times when I met someone single I liked I was always turned down. I have remained single, not by choice, for over 16 years.

Now its too late. Nobody wants to date someone over 40 who has no relationship or bedroom experience. I can't even remember the last time I met a single woman within my age range. And even if I do meet one, what are the odds that we will be attracted to each other and compatible with from such a limited pool.

And finally, I now have erectile dysfunction; so even if I do meet my perfect match I will never be able to be intimate with her.