Hi! Hoping to find support here.

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Hi everyone! I am 41 year old male working in Hangzhou, China. I am not diagonosed but my 3 year old boy is diagonosed Aspie. I found this place here when I was gathering information for parenting, and I hope I will find support from you guys.

The thing went like this. I personally had suspect for austic disorders when my kid first learnt to walk because he tended to walk on his toes from time to time, but it didn't last quite long so I decided to ignore it. We travelled to Japan for hollidays this month and when we were there, he just lost his temper for unusually long time (asking to watch cartoons when we were at a restaurant). It again added to my suspect and we decided to bring him for ADOS test when we got back from hollidays. And the doc was like judged the first glance at him and said that was typical Asperger. That was last friday and my wife and I went to parenting lectures orginized by the hospital this weekend but we are still a bit blind about what to expect. We bought books and we are still learning about it.

Currently I am on Trazodone because of sleep disorders, so I am not very emotional at the moment. My wife somehow managed to accept the fact and is possitively seeking solutions. But we know we have lots of challenges ahead. I just hope my kid will live a life without so many difficulties. I am happy that I arrived in this forum here, and hope I can find information, help and support.

Hello Wanglius,

Welcome, I'm pretty new myself in the forum but never the less welcome!
I'm ASD diagnosed (type 1) and a dad of 3 (all neurotypical) and I understand your concerns, they are very normal and human.

Perhaps 2 books I can recommend, especially valid for parents:
- Turn Autism Around: An Action Guide for Parents of Young Children with Early Signs of Autism by Mary Lynch Barbera, Ph.D., RN, BCBA-D

- A Full Life with Autism: From Learning to Forming Relationships to Achieving Independence by Chantal Sicile-Kira and Jeremy Sicile-Kira
(useful as for any parent will have to tackle the question of what happens when I can no longer be their support system...)

good luck
Kada

Hi Kada! Thank you for the welcome and recommendations!

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

wanglius, Welcome to Wrong Planet.

You wrote that you were concerned about the future of your son who has been diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome (Aspie).

You spoke about your 3 year old son walking on tip toes. That reminded me of a conversation that I had with a member on this site who also exhibited the same trait even as he grew into adulthood. He had an I.Q of 155.

You wrote, "I am happy that I arrived in this forum here, and hope I can find information, help and support." As your child ages, he will undergo many changes. He may run into difficulties at school around age 12 or 13 and may be abused by his classmates in school. This is the age when a child changes to an adult. They may have special schools where he can fit in better and not be targeted.

Do not consider your son as someone who is broken. He is just different and has unique skills that others do not possess.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

I was my parents' first child so they were not sure what to expect. What they got was me!

If your son works like I did then, in general, he wants to behave. Sometimes he doesn't know how; sometimes he thinks it would be messed up.

My parents noticed when I was young that I wasn't making eye contact with people so they told me it was polite to look at people when I'm talking to them. So, I look at people when I'm talking to them. However, my parents never said I was supposed to look in people's eyes so I don't do that...I look at them, but not at their eyes. In general this has not caused problems.

I've posted elsewhere about my preferences then. In a few years you might want to ask your son about his preferences.

Overall, I'd encourage you to be patient with him.

Good luck to you both!