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The left side of my brain does not trust the right side. This is true the other way around as well.
Very excellent goodly scientists, all over the place, from everywhere, believe this is the cause of people getting cross-eyed. The left side and right side eyes are keeping an eye on each other. It is called Janus Paranoia.
To be fair, people not interested in dogma believe it is the left, or right side of brain being taken over my shadow demons.

(some may think this belief insensitive, but remember, this is hardcore truth, with Science! Well, the demons are some crackpot theory.)

i sound like Mickey Mouse

4 out of 5 doctors recommend DIY surgery.

I've never twisted a jingle for a commercial in my life.

Having finally been on an aeroplane, now I know they don’t fly, the runway is one long road for the plane to just drive to its destination

Riding a crotch rocket motorcycle at unsafe speeds is recommended by 4 out of 5 morticians.

1998 And 2007 were the best years of my life. I felt a lot of love and acceptance in 1998. Nobody gave up on me in 2007 and I really felt accepted by everyone.

Inviting people to smell your fingers is good social etiquette.