Cindy wrote:
I doubt I would get an official diagnosis, and I am not really interested in pursuing one at this point in my life.
I'm having a hard time with that question right now. My life has some similarity to yours: 39yo, 140+ IQ, evaluated well ahead of my peers in grade 4 (but in my case *not* advanced for reasons I will never know), ostracised, traumatized, and now something of a wunderkind to my employer of 12 years.
Sometimes I tell myself that a diagnosis won't change anything at this stage of my life as I've learned to cope with just about everything I face on a routine basis and I'm well accepted by a society that values geeks just enough to overlook our faults. At the same time, I can never escape the nagging question of what is *really* wrong inside my head. What if I'm NOT living with AS but am really schizophrenic, psychotic, or something worse and just making light of the situation? Don't I owe it to myself (not to mention society) to make sure it's
really AS and not something dangerous? Or to go the other way, is it possible that I'm just "blaming" AS for personal failures that aren't neurological at all, in which case I could realize a greater potential through proper counselling and a stiff boot to the behind? Last but not least is the potential that I'm in the PDD-NOS group and represent just another random collection of traits that are similar to AS and yet different. I can't think of any way to eliminate potential bias other than to turn the diagnosis over to someone impartial.
Decisions, decisions! Has anyone else here been officially diagnosed in their 30s or 40s? Did it make a difference in your life?
21 Dec 2004, 12:37 pm
