isolated 5yo
missykrissy wrote:
well, today went very well. he came out several times to spend time with us. he also came out everytime i went upstairs to tell me he loves me. (: i love it when he says that as it's a fairly new thing for him to say to anyone. he even ate down here although not exactly with us but in the same room. i gave him a hug and he didn't cry. i had a talk with him about how we all love him very much and made sure he knew we really enjoyed having his company and especially so since he was being such a good boy today. he helped me clean up with only a small bit of crying until i explained if he wants to play ball with the baby we have to pick up all the toys so he won't fall down while chasing the ball.
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and he even layed with his head on my lap, i was not allowed to touch him but i'm good with that as it's pretty rare that he starts any kind of affectiony stuff.
That reminds me of myself and my mom. Of course I'm a lot older than your stepson, but it's the same kind of thing, or sounds like it: knowing how to show affection physically (as opposed to through small-talk) but being sensitive to touch and compromising by initiating touch myself and not receiving it. It's a combination of knowing exactly what's comfortable and the same reason why it's so hard to tickle yourself.
Wow! That's a lot!
Sounds par for the course. (And fun!)
I don't know if it's the same for your son, but I feel like I need to keep secrets because... I don't know how to explain. Because just by knowing what I'm doing, other people can ruin it. Steal it. But not really that-- worse than that. Like, corrupt it into something twisted and awful. Like, I've been known to get upset because a song I kept singing got stuck in my mother's head and she started humming it.
I wonder why.
Oh, my. They can have more side-effects than usual in people with ASDs, which is saying a lot because they're scary stuff to begin with. Be careful, okay? I mean, I'm obviously not there judging what's going on, but... hey, wait; did he start isolating so much after you started him on it?
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That reminds me of myself and my mom. Of course I'm a lot older than your stepson, but it's the same kind of thing, or sounds like it: knowing how to show affection physically (as opposed to through small-talk) but being sensitive to touch and compromising by initiating touch myself and not receiving it. It's a combination of knowing exactly what's comfortable and the same reason why it's so hard to tickle yourself.
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i think he spent about 4 hours engaged with us today, maybe more.
Wow! That's a lot!
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i'm not always sure what he does in his room, cronos. often he is sitting with a blanket in his chair rocking back and forth. he will usually have some cars or something with noise buttons when he's doing this and do the typical AS child tire spinning/pressing the same button over and over. he has 3 blankets he likes up there. one is a heavy blanket, one is a baby activity blanket meant to be played with on the floor that has things all over it and one is a quilt i sewed for him with lots of different colours and textures on it. he sometimes watches movies but i limit tv in the house and he doesn't know how to use the tv/dvd. i will usually put it on for him unless he has been watching it all day already. sometimes he piles up all his toys on his bed or plays with his stimming type things i bought him.
Sounds par for the course. (And fun!)
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other times he'll hide whatever he's doing when i check on him and cry when i ask him what he's doing. when i look it's usually just things he's supposed to have so i don't know why he tries to hide them.
I don't know if it's the same for your son, but I feel like I need to keep secrets because... I don't know how to explain. Because just by knowing what I'm doing, other people can ruin it. Steal it. But not really that-- worse than that. Like, corrupt it into something twisted and awful. Like, I've been known to get upset because a song I kept singing got stuck in my mother's head and she started humming it.
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i always check when he hides things though because he has a history of having dangerous things up there(like knives he used to steal from the kitchen or matches, if he finds my purse he will always take the matches) these things are all locked up now though.
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he does on occasion destroy things in his room but not so much since he's been put on an anti-psychotic to stop him from hurting himself and screaming all the time.
Oh, my. They can have more side-effects than usual in people with ASDs, which is saying a lot because they're scary stuff to begin with. Be careful, okay? I mean, I'm obviously not there judging what's going on, but... hey, wait; did he start isolating so much after you started him on it?
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anyways, he has a tent with tunnels in his room too he likes to go in and blocks or magnets to make stuff from. i do check on him everytime i go upstairs and his siblings also check in with him often just to see if he wants them to play with him.
Well, from your previous description of his behavior, it sounds like he's happy and somewhat more social than I am. If I were isolating to that degree, I don't think I'd take kindly to that, but it sounds like he's doing fine (and has a much higher tolerance for people than I do, but then, I was more social at his age, too). So I want to point out that this is a strategy I would have bet would fail, but if everything from your first paragraph is accurate, what you're doing is clearly working. I'm not too surprised, though, given that he spent four hours with you. (For me, I'd do four hours on a special occasion if I really, really wanted to do something... though he might also have been lonely and well-rested.)
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I'm using a non-verbal right now. I wish you could see it. --dyingofpoetry
NOT A DOCTOR
