Giving the District a Decision, What Would You Do?

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one thing you also need to figure out is where do *you* fit into this plan ? can you see yourself homeschooling indefinitely ? as you've stated that finances are an issue, can you see yourself being able to afford one less income for an extended period of time ? i know it's not the popular answer, but in the end you have to be happy too.
i know from experience that fighting the system is long & arduous~that it has caused many adverse health symptoms for me.....i unfortunately cannot homeschool, as i carry the health insurance & am the "major breadwinner" in the family. take your time making such an important decision. you only have one chance to raise your child~and the time is now.

We make craploads more money with my husband working and my staying home. We were on SSI supplements, two jobs and still looking at bankruptcy in California. Here in AZ, my husband makes a good salary, great health insurance and the living is cheap.
So, it's cheaper if I don't work. Right now I feel better because I'm not dealing with the school staff. I'm not wondering what my son has gone through because I know. I'm not having paranoid delusions like I was starting to have. I was imagining my son being abused there, wondering why he was so afraid of an old lady (the principal). We were constantly having loud, screaming battles over every little thing. I couldn't even give advice to him. My only stress now, is the lack of alone time. for myself and with my husband. and it comes at a time of year that he's having to work over.
I don't know if I can homeschool indefinitely. I really don't. It's fun now, but we're dealing with easy subjects and my son is very bright and confident. He loses patience easily and I have to be on top of that. That was one of the triggers that they were actually setting at school. He'd freak out at the work and the aide would yell or order him to do it. Then he'd tantrum and/or quit working.
He has to have healthy incentives to continue something he doesn't like or finds too daunting.
I know I can do it throughout the first year, especially if we find a sports class for him. There are a lot of field trip opportunities here that are cheap/free and we live near the bus line. I want to instill in him real world skills like riding the bus, meeting people at the park, introducing ones self to strangers.
I'm not sure though, if he'll regret not being around the same group of kids all day. He grows attached easily and misses the kids from him class.

i would still persue things with the district....you just don't know when and if you'll need their assistance again, and it's best to get things straight now rather than later. i'm not saying to keep your son in school~there's plenty of ways that you could keep your son in contact with his old classmates.

There are a number of things that can be done without hiring an attorney. Assuming you have taken your concerns to the building principal and the director of special education, the next stop is the superintendant's office. You mention he/she has been notified but what needs to happen is for you and/or husband to schedule an in person meeting to bring your concerns to his attention. If you haven't done this already there are a number of reasons it should be done (and then followed up with a letter afterwards. First, if you left the notifying to the school staff, it's likely they haven't presented the same arguement. Second, if the school isn't in compliance with the IEP, then they need to know that. Third, sometimes there are rogue dctatorial principals and special education directors who are using the authority granted by their positions but aren't acting in line with the district's philosophies. I have known a few parents who have had immediate changes come about through this meeting.

If you aren't in a position financially or wouldn't pursue a legal route, then I probably wouldn't threaten that route. Due process favors the school districts the majority of the time. A cheaper route to go would be to hire an educational advocate. I know a family who did this (in this case it was an educational psyhologist) who pushed a very resistant school into proper placement and services. It cost about $1000 but the district hasn't given them a lick of trouble and the cost was a drop in the bucket compared to what it would have been to pick up the cost of private therapies to replace what was supposed to happen at school. In that case, the bottom line was that they didn't want special education students at that school and almost always routed them to another school in the district even if they were good candidates for mainsteam.

The other suggestion I would have is to make contact with some other parents with special needs in the district. Either through word of mouth or the closest Autism society or if there's any organizations for general special needs students. Our district actually runs a group for parents of special needs children that meets several times a year. It's a way to form and maintain some positive relationships as well as to get information to the parents on various topics that they bring speakers in for. Anyway, the reason I mention this is that parents in the area generally have a good idea of what's going on in the schools and the districts. It's likely someone can help direct you to someone who has dealt with the school and the district in situations similarly to yours.

We do have to contact the superintendent ourselves, I'm figuring out. We haven't spoken to school staff since pulling Pop out, only the district lady in charge of special ed compliance issues thus far. She's the initial "investigator" and fact-gatherer.

Irony on top of all bitter ironies, the special ed teacher at my son's school is up for a reward for her "success with students". She is one of 12 teachers city-wide (we have 3 districts in our city) nominated for this award. After telling us she has had no training or experience with autistic people, she has the audacity to say in the article that her inspiration to teach came from working with severely disabled adults, including autistics.

If you have the time and want to raise waves, you could protest the awards show or at least try to give the organization giving the award your comments

So, the district lady calls and we will have an IEP meeting with the superintendent present. I guess the school is claiming the IEP says one thing and we are saying another.

it figures....did you keep copies of the most current IEP ?...i've heard of staff doctoring kids IEPs.....one problem with IEPs when they transfer from one district to another, is that the terms are left open to interpretation by the new district~sometimes things are fairly clear, but other times the language in an IEP can be very vague.

Sorry to but in [new to LJ] but I have a close friend in a similar position [I think] = homeschooled for a year because she couldn't get a good fit, then in special ed with lousy IEP, threatened law suit - now in Spec Ed class which is overseen by Michelle Garcia Winner. Best wishes

Yeah, well, we have his IEP that we came with. We transferred it to this school district and it hadn't been finalized because we have been squabbling the whole time. Plus, when we were first going over it, they actually attempted to send it to another school (assuming we were going go there).
We are concerned (now) about doctoring, but if there is any, it's without our consent.

I think we are going to investigate this other district on the other side of town and see if we should just move. Because the optimal schools here are full and they are treating us like we have no special need to be there. In fact the district official was claiming that my son isn't even a special ed student.

BTW, we're going on over 2 weeks and no physical tantrums, hardly any meltdowns and he's eating a barrellful more than he was.

glad to hear he's doing better. you never know, maybe the other district *is* better

I second Pippen's suggestion that you hire an educational advocate. I've heard that's helpful for a number of people.

The most important thing is that when you have discussions with any school official, come OVER PREPARED with all sorts of info. I used to take my copy of Wrightslaw (http://www.amazon.com/Wrightslaw-Emotio ... F8&s=books)

with me to the district meetings, and have it completely covered with post it notes referring to the very problems we were dealing with. I also brought a tape recorder to record every meeting so that nobody could say "no, I never said that". The tape recorder was a suggestion from our therapist for our son. Once we moved to a district that understood the specific special needs of our son, I never had to do this radical stuff again.

You may have a good idea, looking into moving to the next district closest to you. Try and find some parent support group to attend in your area (look at AutismLink.com for a group close to you) and then you'll be able to find out what district is good, what teachers/principals are understanding, etc.

This whole thread brings up an idea.....


<Drum roll - Alex feel free to relist as new topic>>>>

Why not have a worng planet contest for the best and worst school programs. Parents can submitt nominations, experienced parents can choose the top ten in each category, and then we all vote.

The outcomes get sent to the schools and the local newspapers and maybe reuters, NBC, ABC, CBS.

How would the school district in question like to recieve a nommination for worst .

1. You don't have to sign the IEP no matter what anyone tells you
1a. An IEP can have certain very distinct advantages
2. Everything my wife and I ever did with special ed was a mistake
3. If you live in California, you need to look into Eastfield Ming Quong in Cupertino, San Diego, or Sacramento. Especially to talk to a man named Earl Kelly. He's a nice guy, he'll talk to you on the phone without charge, and if you want to PM me, I'll give you more information. The fact that you are on SSI makes you eligible for certain legal services without charge.

Again, if you want to persue this, pm me.
Regards,
beentheredonethat

thanks, but we are no longer in California. in Arizona
isn't Earl Kelly with FEAT? Sounds familiar.
The meeting is this Wed (29th) and we will make our needs known and show how the school changed the IEP and even then didn't comply anyways. What we want is pretty basic and simple and if they can't accomodate that, then we won't send our son there. We'll get it in writing that they won't accomodate for disability. Then we'll look into another school district.

If a district can't accomodate a student then by law they are reuired to provide an alternative in the form of transporting and paying tuition for the child to attend elsewhere. It's not easy to get them to agree most of the time but it can be done.