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I cannot understand when people are lying

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Rotter
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02 Aug 2023, 8:24 pm

In the past, I wondered why and how various morons were much better than me at detecting lies. Eventually I discovered the answer. My thinking was "Innocent until proven guilty", whereas the morons used the reverse technique: "Guilty until proven innocent" or "Lies until proven honest". That's how these morons were more successful than me at detecting lies. So then I made an effort to try to re-train myself to think like the morons do: Everyone is lying until proven otherwise. This technique eventually improved my lie-detection skills greatly.

There exists a joke about this:

Q: How do you know whether they're lying?
A: They're lying when their lips are moving.

That's a joke but it's also mostly true in real life. It's an exaggeration of the truth, but it's still quite helpful to try to remember this joke and apply it in real life.

Note their lies are not necessarily intentional lies. Many NT people tell unintentional lies as well as intentional lies. They also lie to themselves within their own minds (AKA self-delusion).



MaxE
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06 Aug 2023, 2:20 pm

Rotter wrote:
In the past, I wondered why and how various morons were much better than me at detecting lies. Eventually I discovered the answer. My thinking was "Innocent until proven guilty", whereas the morons used the reverse technique: "Guilty until proven innocent" or "Lies until proven honest". That's how these morons were more successful than me at detecting lies. So then I made an effort to try to re-train myself to think like the morons do: Everyone is lying until proven otherwise. This technique eventually improved my lie-detection skills greatly.

There exists a joke about this:

Q: How do you know whether they're lying?
A: They're lying when their lips are moving.

That's a joke but it's also mostly true in real life. It's an exaggeration of the truth, but it's still quite helpful to try to remember this joke and apply it in real life.

Note their lies are not necessarily intentional lies. Many NT people tell unintentional lies as well as intentional lies. They also lie to themselves within their own minds (AKA self-delusion).

This is something any aspie can learn. The advantage however is having a clear understanding of the mechanism rather than acting out of instinct.


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hmk66
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29 Aug 2023, 7:18 pm

xenawarriorprincess wrote:
I always know when people are lying and keeping things from me.

In the past I didn't have that skill: knowing when someone is lying.

Now, I can use my very good memory and intelligence to know when someone is lying or telling the truth.

If someone contradicts himself, he is likely lying. He forgot what he said before or is denying that, but I still remember.

I try to remember as much as possible about everyone. It will be easier to catch someone lying.



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