Why am I never approached? EVER!

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Raleigh
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09 Jan 2019, 3:15 am

i doubt a letter would be well received.
to me it's like when you were in high school and you're too embarrassed to talk to your crush so you slip them a love note, or worse, get your friend to do it.
Then they send it back with a box drawn on the paper with a NO and a tick inside it.
It's cringey stuff. :lol:


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RetroGamer87
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09 Jan 2019, 11:03 pm

fifasy wrote:
Can you try being more obvious?

I met a woman once who looked at my shoes then climbed all the way up my body with her eyes, she did this a few times while I was talking to her. That was probably one of the more obvious examples I've ever had of a woman showing interest.

If a woman did that to me, I most probably wouldn't notice.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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10 Jan 2019, 1:03 am

RetroGamer87 wrote:
fifasy wrote:
Can you try being more obvious?

I met a woman once who looked at my shoes then climbed all the way up my body with her eyes, she did this a few times while I was talking to her. That was probably one of the more obvious examples I've ever had of a woman showing interest.

If a woman did that to me, I most probably wouldn't notice.


What more than that she needs to do to make you notice? Giving you a head?



WantToHaveALife
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12 Jan 2019, 2:21 am

well now you know how guys feel



quite an extreme
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16 Jan 2019, 2:16 pm

hurtloam wrote:
Yes, don't be cold.

I thought about that again. May be NTs expect you to show a seductive behaviour towards them within your body language to signal that you are interested in being approached and they don't expect you being interested in being approached otherwise? Could be that's a point that I lacked too and why I didn't understand the behaviour of women towards me. May be sombody here who is overly emotional can answer this question?


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16 Jan 2019, 10:05 pm

Many men today are afraid to approach women.



quite an extreme
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02 Mar 2019, 7:11 am

The difference is that NT women show (or try to pretend) in their body language that they want affection and expect the guys to recognize the signals and react to it. NT guys expect women to show this behaviour before approaching them. Once you totally lack all of those signals in your body language you count as being rather strange and you are ignored or even avoided.
The second problem of women on the spectrum and NTs is that they are mostly much more direct instead of seducing and for NTs it's a totally strange behaviour. NT guys expect the typical seducing signals in body language instead. For this you have to learn a bit how to be seducable.
The third problem that you'll always have problems with your lack of deep empathy even if it's not the most important thing in first step.
So how to deal with this? Don't be to artifical. It renders you even stranger and doesn't really help. Once you like somebody then try a short eye contact in first step or a smile towards him. Stroking the hair behind her ears and staying near to him is a typical first thing of flirting for NT women. Do a short contact with breasts, hips while passing him or try to lean on him a bit with your back if standing near to him and wait a for the reaction afterwards. It's a normal thing that nearly all NT women do as soon as they like a guy.
Learn to swing your hips a bit while moving and especially while dancing. It's a really strong sexual signal to men. It causes guys to dream about you a bit how it is to feel this while body contact. Once a guy tries body contact show whether you are comfortable with this by forcing the contact or reject him immediately once you don't like it. Play a bit with body contact and in case of a positive reaction don't be shy anymore.
But why did I mention the empathy? Because it's a bit the base for strong love beside pure sexual desire. It's to get the feelings each other and to enforce this feelings towards you by showing that you like it too and to behave in a way that enforces the positive feelings in an incredible way. It the base of a really strong emotional binding.
It's also the thing with flirting. It's sending signals to the other that show that you like the other and to react positive of the others signals is enforcing for the related feelings and fun for the people who do it.
May be this helps a bit. :wink:


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