How to teach son to bath himself
Hello out there! Any ideas on how to teach my 10-yr-old autistic son to bath himself? I've thought of visuals, but it seems like it would be this massive thing with 100 or so icons on it, not very practical, to wash & rinse each body part. Me just telling him & demonstrating for him is
not working--he just zones out. An icon book/story maybe? Again, seems like it would be SOOO
big & overwhelming for him. HELP??
My son is only 3, so we're not there yet. But maybe you could try teaching your son one step at a time. For example, spend one week working on just running the bath water. Then add the next step when he has mastered that by himself and without prompting. And so on. It might take a year, but just peck away at it.
Yup, working on this with my 9 year old Aspie twins too. Not even close to doing it independently yet. They can wash their own bodies now, but still need help with hair, faces etc. I think working on it really slowly, one skill at a time is a good plan, and a visual chart for what to do in what order would be great idea (laminated so it's waterproof, of course).
It's a good age to work on it, but results may be slow coming. Walk him through the steps for a year or two and it may become habit enough for him to bathe on his own. I know it feels weird and like he should be able to do it, but that he cannot seems to be well within the range of "normal" for AS kids.
It took a lot of patience but I used to sit in the bathroom and give my son step by step instructions. When it got too weird to me, my husband took over. Now, at age 12, we can send him to bathe with frequent reminders called in through the door. But we still have some days he'll come out and I'll just KNOW he didn't wash his hair or didn't use any soap. Sigh.
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Mom to an amazing young adult AS son, plus an also amazing non-AS daughter. Most likely part of the "Broader Autism Phenotype" (some traits).
I find having a shower is easy and if you implement a pattern for him to follow then it can work.
So...the loufa/ soap down one arm, turn arm over then other side. Armpit, chest, other arm then stomach, crotch, legs. If you can instill in him a pattern, it'll be easier to cope because he won't be stressing over what to wash first since he'll know everything get's washed.
*Shrugs*
That said...I find shower gels to be better than soap. Often smoother and nicer than regular soap, and smells better. I use a Lynx one that smells like sea salt. Very, very nice. So if you can get him to find a soap he likes/ shower gel/ whatever...will make bathing easier because he'll enjoy the smell.
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"We will not capitulate - no, never! We may be destroyed, but if we are, we shall drag a world with us - a world in flames."
- Adolf Hitler
My son, aged 7, loves the bath and will run a bath for himself now. However, it's more of a play activity than a way of getting clean, as became very clear last night when he went for a bath after a day getting dirty playing outside and got out the bath with his face as filthy as it was when he went in.
I still can't work out how he managed to bathe and wash his hair without cleaning even the tiniest part of his face.
Easy.
Much like swimming, lean your head back until the water-line touches the very limit of the hair on your forehead.
Face-cloths can be rather abrasive so...how would he feel about just rubbing his face with his hands, with hands wet?
Failing that...maybe a silk face-cloth if he has tactile problems.
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"We will not capitulate - no, never! We may be destroyed, but if we are, we shall drag a world with us - a world in flames."
- Adolf Hitler
It took a lot of patience but I used to sit in the bathroom and give my son step by step instructions. When it got too weird to me, my husband took over. Now, at age 12, we can send him to bathe with frequent reminders called in through the door. But we still have some days he'll come out and I'll just KNOW he didn't wash his hair or didn't use any soap. Sigh.
This is pretty much what we're doing with my 7 yo. I'm handing over one tiny task at a time to him. It takes tons of patience, because I know that I could just take over, and we'd be done sooo much faster, but I know he'll never learn anything from that. I also make silly jokes, like when he insists that I wash his back for him, I tell him that he has to figure out how to do it himself. I explain to him that I can't call my mom every time I get int he shower to wash my back, or to help with lotion, so he also needs to learn to take care of it himself. He laughs at the silly idea of an adult calling their parents for help in the shower. It also helps him to understand the logic behind why I'm suddenly breaking the routine, and making him do things for himself.
I think a visual strip of steps would help some kids, but I have no idea where you could hang it so that it wouldn't get ruined in the shower.
Much like swimming, lean your head back until the water-line touches the very limit of the hair on your forehead.
Face-cloths can be rather abrasive so...how would he feel about just rubbing his face with his hands, with hands wet?
Failing that...maybe a silk face-cloth if he has tactile problems.
Lol! I hate getting my face wet so I bathe the way you describe. My son, on the other hand, is like a little fish - he loves the water and usually twists and twirls under the water. He must just have waited until his face was the dirtiest it has ever been before trying out the dry face method!
I think a visual strip of steps would help some kids, but I have no idea where you could hang it so that it wouldn't get ruined in the shower.
You could try drawing on the tiles or shower screen with bath crayons. They have pretty fine points for drawing with and should be able to withstand a lot of water going over them. When you want to change them they wipe off easily if you rub with a cloth.
Another option might be the bath/tile stickers you get for children. My son had Thomas ones, but you might be able to get ones with a specifically bath-time theme. Sponges, soap etc...
My little guy is 10 too and we've finally got it down to a good routine. Our routine is easy. He has a plastic basket that has "his" bathing supplies (loofah, soap, shampoo) so that he doesn't get confused with all of my girly products in there. Then I remind him "top to bottom and all the sneaky parts" So he starts at the top and works his way down. "Sneaky parts" means armpits and private areas. He still struggles with his hair a bit, but he's getting better with practice. Since he showers every other day I figure in a weeks time, he should hit all of the parts.
Since our reminder line is so short, and it's all we say when he goes into the shower, it's easy for him to remember and I find he's more successful that way.