Happiness?
techstepgenr8tion
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07 Jul 2009, 11:42 am
monty wrote:
Well, the word happiness is like the word love - it has different meanings. But I think I get one distinction you are making - what I call 'reactive happiness' which occurs in response to something ... I won a prize, and it (temporarily) made me happy. Things went well today, so I am happy (temporarily). My team won the game, so I am (temporarily) in good spirits. Reactive happiness is not bad, but it is often beyond our control, and it is not deep or ultimately satisfying.
A complement of reactive happiness in basal happiness - the normal emotional state when not really focusing on external circumstances. Reducing desires, meditating and praying, having thankfulness and compassion rituals, exercising in moderation ... these all can improve basal happiness or contentment. In some cases, this can develop to bliss-like levels.
A complement of reactive happiness in basal happiness - the normal emotional state when not really focusing on external circumstances. Reducing desires, meditating and praying, having thankfulness and compassion rituals, exercising in moderation ... these all can improve basal happiness or contentment. In some cases, this can develop to bliss-like levels.
You've probably had the most constructive input so far but still, I don't even mean the chemical instant 'feel good' - that still qualifies more as satiation, joy, etc. and is a feeling rather than a chosen state.
techstepgenr8tion
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07 Jul 2009, 11:53 am
zer0netgain wrote:
All I know about happiness is that it's a choice you make. For me, the secret is to learn to find contentment with nothing. If you feel you need something to be complete, you will likely never be happy.
That's exactly what I think myself, the only thing with that which is missing is that I think it needs in connection with that something to staple that to - in terms of contentment with nothing, you need a value system that assists in truly needing nothing and being able to disconnect yourself from the pushes and pulls. No, I definitely don't think anyone can disconnect completely and I know that the temptations to chase one thing or another such as prestige, money, power, etc. to fill a void will always be there; but the wisest know how to battle this as well as any existential depression that comes from loss of hope.
zer0netgain wrote:
I've been down the dark path of suicide enough to know that what most inclines a person to go through with it isn't so much being unhappy as it's a loss of hope. I spent many years being miserable. I thought of ending my life many times, but I always held out hope that things would get better. The closest I ever came to following through with my wishes to end my life happened when I hurt so badly that I gave up hoping that things could ever get better.
The challenge seems to be, with that tactic employed already that age starts to catch up with people and I've noticed myself that at the end of my 20's and now about to turn the corner on 30, the 'give it time' thing gets harder to maintain. I've always figured that marking down what other people have and assuming that everyone has the same set of emotions and pains to deal with means that relatively speaking there's much less to be expected from life. That helps, definitely, though my overwhelming desire is to be the kind of person who can give back and has enough backlighting to inspire others and better/enrich the lives of the people around me - holding steady you can at least be there for people somewhat but I guess this is one area in that regard that I want to have more to offer other people, just like I'd rather have more to offer myself on some levels. I've known enough people in my family - in older generations, who seem to have it locked and of course they have just as many ups and downs but the years taught them something important somewhere along the line.
07 Jul 2009, 7:18 pm
techstepgenr8tion wrote:
MrLoony wrote:
This is what I'm saying: People think that, because these things grant them joy and what have you at the lower levels, they think that, somehow, they will obtain happiness through this. Either that or they see others that are supposedly happy or they have the idea from other external sources. They pursue these things; they force the issue. But happiness doesn't work on force. It works on its own, infusing our lives. But as soon as we try to gather more, it leaves us. Happiness doesn't work on a spectrum, it's just there. You either have it or you don't. Those who don't force it, have it. Those who do, don't.
Are we omitting then integrity, character, thought, choices of action and reaction, and management of psychological outlook? I'm really talking about disengaging it from the 'simple pleasures' and bringing it from within.
It's always in us. We don't need to find it, we need to accept it. The idea that simple pleasures, if amassed, can lead to happiness is one of the reasons why so many people are unhappy. Another reason is the idea that there is a finite amount of happiness, that it even has a quantity, and so they seek out more and push aside the happiness they have in pursuit of it. I'm not talking about simple pleasures, for people must seek even these out and obtain them to have such things. There is still qualification. Rather, happiness exists in all of us at all times, waiting for us to accept it.
Words, at least for me, are rather inadequate in this case, I'm afraid. I don't know how to explain it any better.
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I'm working my way up to Attending Crazy Taoist. For now, just call me Dr. Crazy Taoist.
