The importance of lying to getting a girlfriend

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I think that the issue with creepiness may not be that they are too "deep" as much as too intense. I had a lot of trouble finding dates because I was just too intense for a lot of people.

I think it's a classic chicken/egg dilemma:

Are very good looking people automatically unintelligent/incapable of deep thinking?

Or are they simply able to thrive comfortably in life based on looks alone, and have no hardships to cultivate their character or think deeply, no reasons to use intelligence?

You cannot build a solid relationship on a lie.

Yet ... there are definitely things that shouldn't be spoken of until you are on more solid footing with the person you are interested in.

Learn the art of timing your disclosures carefully, or deflecting untimely questions, but do not speak untruths, or you will have ruined any chance of advancing the relationship beyond a casual one.

I guess it all depends on what you want with the person.

Are you saying there are no good looking people who are also extremely bright and deep thinking? I would disgree, although the way people treat one who has good looks does tend to encourage them to develop superficiality, and they will have to actively fight that if they want to use their intellect. But I've known people who've succeeded in avoiding the trap. It's really interesting to spend 24 hours around someone like that, and see how life challenges them in a very unique way.

I think some of both -- some people have the looks, but not the brains, and some of them are able to skate by or reproduce before they die (and thus pass on those "pretty" genes).

There are others who have the capacity but not the motivation.

The third group, who are the most dangerous, or effective, are the ones who have the looks and the brains, and use both to great effect.

Former U.S. president John F. Kennedy (sigh )

No Space, indeed they can be just as deep as the ones who are plain or ugly. The only difference is they're probably more bound to attract people than those who aren't eye candy. I've seen a lot of guys go for girls just as shallow as this arguement in women going for shallow guys. Most of my observations in some of the guys I've interated with was always....they will never find a girl as hot as the one they got. Kind of the same excuse I hear women give when they're in an abusive or possesive relationship.

I don't think lying or being superficial is really a "normal" trait but rather one based off insecurity. And......I don't see insecurity as being all that nice as it is hard to love someone who isn't secure and happy with themselves ergo secure with people. If you can't be secure aren't very secure with that particular person or yourself....it's bound to rub off on them the wrong way.

Also, not all relationships are about winning numbers. Just because that person has dated a lot of people isn't indicative of how long or how fullfilled their relationships have been. It is my understanding that most women especially want to be looked as people first then a potential partner. You can't force people to like you unless you give them time to show their true actions. Everyone is shallow to a certain degree but most of that will usually go away once they've become more comfortable with you and you've become comfortable with them.

Last edited by MissConstrue on 14 Aug 2009, 5:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Depending on your tastes, Bill Clinton as well. Though for some reason he seems to have a fetish for ugly/unattractive women....

I consider myself good looking and extremely bright and deep thinking, so no it's not impossible.

That is a very broad and unfair generalisation to make. Judging by men's behaviours towards me and, well, by what they say, I am a good-looking girl. And yet I have three degrees (through scholarship and jobs, jobs, jobs, not daddy's money), a high-paying awesome career, I read voraciously and have been known my entire life as a "brain". I also happen to prefer to be invisible than the "hot chick" in the room - precisely because many men will assume I'm a ditsy blonde and their attempts to chat me up are beyond insulting. I will almost never play up my appearance, and when I do, it's subtle.

Maybe there are some good-looking people who choose not to use their intelligence - but frankly, anyone who makes that choice was probably not very bright to begin with.

The best way to ensure that you never end up in a relationship with a beautiful, clever woman is to assume she's stupid.

http://www.viewzone.com/beauty99.html

my post was meant as a joke. I've been done with serious responses on this subforum for a long time, in case you haven't noticed

I should take Anna's route...

All the work I put in my feedback and no response or input >_<

By whose definition? I see a book referenced without any study or determining factors shown - would appreciate a little more information on these 'factoids'.


M.

No, your post wasn't a joke. It sounded regular and sincere. Nice try for an evasion.

Last edited by LePetitPrince on 16 Aug 2009, 11:21 am, edited 1 time in total.

It's the summary of a book, buy the book if you want more info.