EmmiSpeaks wrote:
Anyone else deal with a constant stream of NT presumptions and accusations?
I think my generally "strangeness" as they say, is giving the impression that I'm "ret*d" or childish or mentally deficient in some way?
Just because I sound/act differently doesn't mean I'm going to be drawing all over the walls with crayons or something similar!
They speak to me like a parent who is scolding their child? Or maybe dog.
It really bothers me...
Well, I don't have this issue, because my AS symptoms are pretty mild, if I'm AS at all. But I'm sure that must be really annoying. I think people just don't know any better, and aren't sure how to act. People rely on feedback from others, and if what they get from you is something they aren't familiar with, they won't know how to act.
I have a neighbor who I see sometimes around town. He's a 15 or 16 year old, nonverbal autistic boy. He's usually with his father, who I suspect might be AS himself. The boy is always swaying back and forth. I've been seeing him for eight years, and he's always swaying. But one day, he walked up to me, gently put his arm in mine, and we walked along together for a bit. I said something to him, and he said a few syllables I didn't understand. It was kind of neat experience, but it was also a little uncomfortable because I have NO idea what he understands, and therefore I wasn't sure how I was supposed to try to communicate with him. Nowadays, I understand autism better, and suspect he would have understood anything I would have said. But maybe he wouldn't have. I didn't want to offend him by talking down to him, but I didn't want to go the other way either. So mostly we just walked. He reached out to me for a connection, and I didn't know what I should do. Should I have said something like, "I notice that you like to sway back and forth. I think I'll try that and see what it's like," and did a bit of swaying? Or would he have thought I was making fun of him? I have no idea.
So, I don't know what you are like, but maybe people just really don't know how to act. I bet, in most cases, they don't mean any harm, and they probably wish they knew what was the proper way for them to talk to you. They might be "normal", but they still need a little help, I suppose.