Do you ever convince yourself that something unpleasant is
true?
You're dreading it so much and you believe so intensely and honestly that beyond a shadow of a doubt it's going to happen, and then you think that if you know it's going to happen, it might as well have already happened. I believed that about my boyfriend being smarter, saner, more practical and sensible and logical, wiser, better, quicker, more responsible, more skilled, more talented, better socially, more understanding, more astute and perceptive and knowledeable and intuitive and selfless and clean and healthy and stable and normal than me. And that I'm dumber, more immature, weaker, wimpier, less experienced (well, I probably am), more oblivious and naive, simpler-minded, more clumsy, etc. And that he knows he's better than me in all those ways, and believes he's better than me in all those ways.
